Esteemed (Toph Beifong)
by D3stiny-Sm4sher
Summary: A fanfiction and fanart project chronicling the theoretical livese of Toph & Lin Beifong. This primary story thread follows Toph's journey from childhood through adulthood: her struggles with coming of age, adjusting to life as Police Chief in Republic City, and learning to be a mother, as well as her changing relationships with the friends who serve as her surrogate family.
1. Afraid Not

**A/N: ****As of 8/25/2013, Esteemed is based on ATLA canon leading up to the end of Book 1 of Legend of Korra.**

**'Esteemed' is a fan fiction and fan art project dedicated to exploring the theoretical life of Toph Beifong, from childhood through adulthood. The life of Lin Beifong is also a secondary focus, and the mother-daughter relationship between the two will ideally become the primary relationship in the tale.**

**The currently planned format for the story is to post individual scenes from different parts of Toph's (or perhaps also Lin's) life, and I will be using 'ASC' (After Sozin's Comet) to specify the year, as well as the character's age, at the beginning of each scene.**

**For now, I will be periodically posting Esteeemed scenes I write inbetween finishing my current primary work, 'What I Learned at SRU' (a modern-day college-themed AtLA/LoK series and art gallery).**

**This first scene serves as a 'Pilot' of sorts to demonstrate the tone and concept, and was originally posted on the Internet on July 19, 2012. I chose to be deliberate about what primary romantic relationship this story will involve, but per the narrative, I plan to explore a long and complicated history between those two leading up to this point.**

* * *

**Esteemed  
**_Afraid Not_

* * *

-128 ASC; Summer-  
-Toph's age: 40-

* * *

"-..._awwfff?_" A faint voice, cutting through the murkiness of sleep.

"_Hnngh_..." She could hardly move, her limbs like lead. Everything ached. Her entire body was a lump of numbed, sore flesh coated in a metal suit. The floor was cold against her cheek.

"Toph!" That voice - _his _voice. It was near, but muffled by the daze she was lost in. In this cloud of pain and confusion, his voice was waking her up.

Sprawled on her side, she meagerly grasped her deadened fingertips at the hard floor. Nothing. No pulse of the earth. This was disconcerting.

"Toph," he grunted out again, his voice forced and ragged. She could hear his approach amidst the scuffling of dozens of others, further off.

"_Gugh-_" was all she could manage out before a cough flew from her throat. Her fluids had been displaced, which was throwing her body for a loop.

"Agh, Spirits...You're OK." _Fwumph. _The familiar sounds of his heavy clothes flopped before her, the weight of his body slumping at her side. She could just barely sense the vibration of his knees hitting the ground.

"_Sahk_...-" She choked out, unable to complete his name. She attempted to lift her dizzy head, only for it to fall back to the floor, buckling under her weakened neck.

It suddenly all came back to her now: _weakness. _The dire, horrifying futility she'd experienced, the very blood in her body twisting and writhing out of control. Her arms, tugged from _inside_, grasping the cold, metal keyring. The suffocating pain flooding her body as the world beneath her mostly feet vanished. Moments stretched for a small eternity where the only sensation that existed was the suffering that corkscrewed her body from within. Her neck, snapped around in retaliation of her struggling. The blood slipping from her brain, and the sounds around her - the terrified groaning, the only world she could perceive in that instant - fading away.

Toph Beifong, Chief of Police, self-proclaimed 'Greatest Earthbender in the World,' had been rendered utterly infantile by a man tied in handcuffs with merely a twitch. It had all happened in a matter of seconds, and she'd been powerless against him. Yakone...where was he now? What had happened? Republic City wasn't safe! _Damnit!_ What was she doing on the _floor? _She had to do _something _to stop this crazed psychopath! It was her duty, and she was _failing. _Toph Beifong did not _fail._

While Toph's mind was angrily pushing at this concept, her rubbery body was slowly regaining some sense of self. Now cut from the puppet strings that had choked her, she forced up her left arm from the floor, groping at the air meekly. What had he _done _to her? This was bloodbending? It was now quite apparent to Toph exactly why Katara had been so dire about outlawing the practice.

"Toph?" Sokka's rough, dry palm pressed against her pale cheek, pulling her back to the moment with comfort and familiarity. His other hand swept across the opposing jawline, and her head was tilted up. The warmth of his flesh was like a gust of hot air blowing against the chilled fog of wariness. She sprung awake at the sensation of his lips enveloping hers, and her mouth instinctively puckered out to reciprocate his kiss.

"Sokka," she croaked out, her eyes damp and burning as the reality of what had just transpired came crashing down. Her whole body pulsated with pain, and her heart was still pounding against her ribcage, having been hastened by adrenaline and fear. "Where...-? Where did he go?" Panic was setting in now, the temporary relief of her lover's lips giving way to the impending disaster of Yakone's escape.

Toph's dizzy world was thrown into upheaval as Sokka's rigid arm hoisted itself around her back, pulling her up. He huffed from the effort, still a bit out of sorts, himself. Toph's wobbly legs almost collapsed on themselves, but Sokka latched her arm around his own shoulders, clasping her wrist as he helped steady her.

"I'm not sure," he answered her question. "But...Aang seems to be gone, as well."

No. Damnit. Argh, _no. _What had Yakone done with Aang? Taken him hostage?

"_Gurgh_...Bastard...We have to...-" Toph's feet finally touched the ground, and her heart skipped a beat: she could hardly feel anything. She scrunched up her left toes, and slid her right foot along the stone floor. The world was all a haze, still trying to assume its forms around her. She faltered slightly, still a bit woozy.

"Hey, take it easy," Sokka insisted, gripping her tight.

"Take it _easy_?" Toph growled out. "There's a _madman _out there, and...-" Her brain was dunked in a well of guilt. What if Aang _had _been captured? Or worse? She was supposed to protect this city and its people. If the Avatar - her dear _friend_ - had been hurt...how would she be able to forgive her own shortcomings? She hadn't thought this thing through, she'd just marched up and dragged Yakone to trial, and she'd let Aang tag along. _Argh, _she _knew _she should've made him mind his own business, it was too dangerous. Gah, but if she'd thought things through, she would've been more prepared for this in the first place, and...-

"_Toph_," said Sokka, helping her regain footing, leading her a few steps forward. "Leave that worrying stuff to me and my Sister, all right?" Heh. He knew her well enough to tell when she was going into that dark state of mind. "Aang's the _Avatar. _I bet he's probably putting that creep in his place as we speak. Here." Sokka slowly turned her body around, nudging her to sit at the front pew within the hall. She was resistant to this.

"I can't relax right now," she huffed, taking a step forward. "We need to be doing something about...-" Her legs wobbled and she nearly stumbled, but Sokka's solid grip on her shoulders kept her on her feet.

"Toph, c'mon, you need to _sit _for a minute. Your officers and some others are already checking things out."

"But...-" Toph's metal-bound chest was pressed upon by Sokka's steady hand, easing her down onto the wooden pew despite her protest. She slid her hand across the smooth, wooden surface, savoring the returned sensation to her fingers. "He bloodbent, Aang, too. He could've...-" She lifted her fingers up from the pew and they balled into a wrathful fist, trembling.

_Twinkle-Toes, you'd better be safe. I don't know if I could forgive myself if something happened to you._

"Hey. Dead-Eyes." Sokka's knuckles rattled against her shoulder plate. He was trying to calm her down by being casual, she decided. "What'd I _just _say about worrying? Don't tell me you're going _deaf _on me here, too." Yep, he was definitely trying to get her to relax for a second to regain her bearings. Toph's doubt loosened its grip enough for her to take a deep breath, a small smile emerging. The commotion around her was slowly taking shape at her feet. Her blood was pumping properly through her veins again and her senses were regaining.

"Councilman," called a voice Toph recognized, but didn't associate with on a personal level. Some stuffy office-type Sokka worked with who had a stiff voice. "Chief," he addressed Toph, as well. "Thank goodness. I think everyone is all right."

"Do we know where they've gone?" Sokka demanded, his voice hardened.

"A couple of officers went outside to see if they could find anything, but they just left moments ago."

"Mm," replied Sokka. "Keep us posted."

As hurried footsteps faded off into the flurry of activity behind them, Toph found herself slinking her arm around the padded back of her partner.

"What just _happened?_" Toph mumbled. "I mean...that was _bloodbending, _right? I know he got _us, _but...-"

"Everyone," Sokka breathed out heavily. Toph could detect a tint of horror beneath Sokka's bewildered tone. "I guess you couldn't tell, but..._I _saw it. Everyone in the entire _room._"

"That's-..._No_ way. That's impossible."

"Do you _remember, _about _two_ minutes ago? When I mentioned the man who could firebend with his _mind_? Remember him?"

"..._Oh. _Right. Yea." Toph must not have heard that part. Her mind had been wandering during the trial, which had generally been another boring, pointless affair for her, right up until the delivery of the sentence, of course.

"You weren't even paying _attention _during that trial, were you?" Sokka weakly chuckled, apparently eager to make light humor in spite of the circumstance. "Typical Toph."

"_What? _I was," she insisted. "I definitely was. You proclaimed my bad-assery and everything."

"Yea, of _course _you heard _that _part..." He breathed out a light laugh.

Toph sucked in another deep inhalation and tapped her foot twice on the ground. She could 'see' everything again at last. That had taken much longer than Toph would've preferred. The last time she could think that she had felt a similar sensation was having her chi blocked, back before armor had become part of her uniform. This had felt much more painful than chi blocking, however.

"You good?" Sokka checked when she went to stand up. She snorted with some indignity.

"Of course I'm good." No sooner than she spoke did her right knee tremble slightly under her own weight.

What was the problem here? Everyone else seemed already up and about, scurrying around, and she was all weak in the knees. She was _Toph Beifong, _she was tough as nails. What was going on? Maybe it was just nerves. The prospect of Avatar Aang having been captured and potentially _killed _under her watch did not settle well. The crushing heft of this hypothetical situation slammed Toph in the stomach hard, but she held it in.

"Then let's go out there and see what we can find out," Sokka encouraged, clamping down on her arm briefly. "Lead the way, Chief," he insisted. "This is your investigation, right?"

Toph smirked in reaction to this. Even in uncertain times, that man still tried to add coals to her ego's fire. He should've known better, given what he had just witnessed.

Toph wasn't the invincible, impenetrable wall of Ba Sing Se she often made herself out to be. Yakone, after months and months of pounding away at her armor, had finally drilled a hole right through her solid foundation, letting fear and doubt slip inside.

Toph pushed her way through the hall, heading through the throng of confused and frightened citizens to the front doors, which were still wide open. She ignored the aching of her joints that lingered from the attack, each step firm and unrelenting. Sokka pursued, keeping a bit of distance between the two of them. He could tell from Toph's stern motions that she could spring into violent action at a moment's notice, so it'd be best to give her space.

The midday summer sun beat down on Toph's face. Her body was rapidly moistening from beneath her plating from just a couple minutes of being outdoors. Her steps tipped her off that something had happened further down main street. A wagon, toppled over, and a man buried beneath a formed pillar of stone. It was Yakone, all right. And there were the twinkling little steps of Aang, heading in her direction from the distance.

One of her officers was closer, however, and reached her first.

"Chief! Yakone has been recaptured. Our men are getting ready to put him back in restraints and deliver him to HQ."

"I'm aware," Toph bluntly replied. "Let's exercise some more _caution_ this time around, shall we?" She marched right past the Sergeant, continuing her trek, but was called out from behind by the officer she'd just passed by.

"I don't think that will be a problem, Ma'am!"

What was _that _supposed to mean? Yakone was a serious threat. He needed to be stopped - permanently. He was far too powerful even to be kept restrained. Yes. Right. Far too dangerous! Action had to be taken...here and now. Toph's insides churned with anger. Yakone had planted a seed of fear inside her, and she wasn't going to let it grow. Not an inch. She'd nip this whole matter in the bud, and be done with it. She was the Chief of Police, damnit. Someone had to make the hard decisions around here, especially with the Avatar being a lilly-livered coward. She was ready for Yakone this time. Yes. He wouldn't get the jump on her.

Toph had been at odds with Yakone and his unruly gang for some time now, and that little flourish in the town hall - making _her_ grab the key and unlock him _herself_ - that had been Yakone taunting her, sending a message. That was him rubbing it all over her face that he'd 'won' this long battle they'd waged. All this time...a _bloodbender _of such strength. It was no longer a wonder how he'd manipulated Republic City from the shadows. The savage press had been eating up the whole affair like a wild pack of wolf-bats for months now, and she'd grown quite sick of the trend. Yakone had buried his roots deep in the underground of Republic City with quite an extraordinary power. She'd underestimated Yakone this whole time.

Not anymore.

Toph was so focused on her snowballing plan of vengeance - er, pre-emptive _protection _of the city, rather - that she almost failed to notice the plodding footsteps of Aang approach.

"Yakone has been taken care of," Aang declared with all due solemnity. "He won't be able to...-" But Toph was marching right by him without any response. "Are you all right?" Aang checked, concerned by the wrathful look on his friend's face. "Was anyone injured?"

_Yea, I didn't ask for your help. I can tell everything going on right now with my damned _toes, _and you're no officer of mine. Go back to your stupid island and mind your own business.  
_

"Toph?" Aang called to her.

She'd blown right by him without a word. She was heading straight for Yakone, who was still dazed, given the slowed heart-rate she could detect. He had been removed from the tiny rock prison Aang had apparently trapped him within. One of Toph's Captains had wrapped the deadly arms of the waterbending crime lord behind his back, encasing them in a chunk of solid stone. He'd been blindfolded, as well, as a precaution. It was pleasant to see Toph's men operating efficiently of their own accord, at least.

"Is Toph all right?" Aang muttered to Sokka as his old friend approached.

"She was...pretty shaken up back there," Sokka explained under his breath.

Toph could still clearly hear the two of them, however. 'Shaken up?' Bah. Exaggeration.

"Understandable," Aang remarked. "I think it's safe to say all the stories about Yakone were true."

"No kidding..." Sokka sighed, running his hand across his head. "I'm just glad you were here, Aang. I don't know what we would've done." This compliment ruffled Toph's feathers.

"I am, too," said Aang. "At least he won't be causing us any more trouble."

_Don't act so smug about it, Twinkle-Toes. I'm the one that's been dealing with this creep for months. You don't know what it's been like._

She hadn't wanted Aang here in the first place, and she surely didn't need him upstanding the authority and respect she'd worked so long and hard to earn. Sokka, of all people, jumping to thank Oh-So-Mighty-Mr.-Avatar, saving the day at the last minute after _months _of this? _Puh. _It was insulting.

By now, Toph was within spitting distance of Yakone, who was being hauled away by three officers.

"Back away from him, men," Toph commanded darkly. They all paused at her voice, like the obedient little dogs she'd trained them to be. "I'll handle it from here."

"Uh, but...Chief, it's really not-"  
"_Back away, _Captain."

The trio of officers that were flocked around Yakone did as they were told, and the blind-folded, dizzied man collapsed to his knees without the officers to hold him up. Toph slammed her foot to the road and flicked up her wrists, catching Yakone in a tiny pyramid of solidified dirt.

"You're not going to be harming another _hair _on anyone's head, Yakone," Toph seethed, her expression brutal.

The metal band of meteor rock wrapped around her right arm shivered violently from beneath her armor, her mind swarmed with fear and anger.

_You're dangerous. You can _hurt _me. You can _kill _me. I was powerless before you. I can't tolerate someone like you in _my _city. You have to be stopped once and for all, before anyone else is hurt. _

_Before anyone starts to doubt my ability._

"_Toph_?" Aang cried out from behind, rushing up toward her. He was ignored. She stretched out her arms, and two small, rock-hard dirt clods were formed from chunks of the road. They hovered, a few feet feet away from Yakon's skull, poised to slam together. Her officers flinched back in surprise. "Toph!" Aang growled out, grabbing Toph's shoulder and tugged with ferocity. "What are you _doing? _I took away his _bending_!"

'Took away his bending.' No wonder Aang had seemed so self-assured. Of course. Obviously. It made perfect sense. The idea had slipped her mind, lost in the miasma of hate, shame, and apprehension.

Toph's rage, bubbling out from unfocused eyes, began to trickle down her cheeks. She took in a sharp breath between her teeth, and let her arms drop when she exhaled. The up-heaved chunks of earth crumbled back to dirt, leaving a confused and petrified Yakone to sputter and gasp, falling to his face on the ground.

"I _told _you that I'd resolved the situation," Aang snarled with impatience, pulling Toph around by the shoulder. "What just...-? What _was _that?"

"That...-" Toph sucked in a rough sniff through her nostrils. "That was-"  
"-you having this _under control_?" Aang spat out, throwing Toph's words from earlier that day back in her face.

Her teeth were clenched, and from the contact of his hands on her shoulders he could feel her body trembling.

"That wasn't _control _I just saw," said Aang with rigid disapproval. Toph's face squirmed with bridled embarrassment. The Avatar was publicly scolding her in front of her own officers like a child. "And it was _you _being controlled back there at the trial. _All _of us. If I hadn't been here, who _knows _what could've happened." Toph could sense Aang's tense muscles relax in a thoughtful pause as he calmed his temper. "But it's finished, now. I've taken _care_ of it. I'm not sure what's wrong with you, but I think you'd best take the rest of today to yourself."

_Since when did _you _become my boss? I'm _Chief of Police, _not some celebrity who lives on a little island vacation home away from the people._

Toph forcibly shoved Aang's grip from her. It was infuriating, this entire mess. Her brain was clouded and stressed from everything that had transpired today and the days prior. It was a lot to take in, and evidently her rattled soul couldn't cope with it properly. She was a little light-headed from all of the pressure pushing her skull from the inside out. Her armpits were damp with sweat, her forehead was starting to drip from the summer heat. She was exhausted, both physically and mentally. But she was _Toph Beifong, _she couldn't just call it a day.

"I don't...-" she began to protest, trailing off.

"Lin's still back at the island with Katara and the kids," Aang explained to her quietly as the policemen awkwardly resumed their duty of transporting Yakone to headquarters. "We can watch over her tonight so you have some space to yourself, if-"  
"I _think _I can handle my own _daughter_, Aang," Toph grunted out spitefully, stepping away from the Avatar. Twinkle-Toes and Sugar-Queen had been strongly applying the passive-aggresivity lately, treating her like she was incompetent with her own kid. More insults to her ability.

"I'm sorry, Toph, but right now, it seems like you can't even handle _yourself_," Aang countered with disappointment.

Guilt was pressing down hard in this moment. Toph hadn't taken proper caution with Yakone. Aang could've been captured. The city could've been put in danger. She had a _daughter _to be thinking about, with whom she was on shaky ground with. She'd nearly killed a man out of rage and fear. And Aang was taking great strides to help her in every way, and she was spitting it back in his face out of arrogance and egotism. She was in too deep – the shame was a pit she currently didn't have the willpower to climb out of. She suddenly felt bad for how she'd been treating Aang, and what she'd even been thinking of him. But she didn't have the capacity to apologize right now. Her cheeks burned pink and her eyes stung from the stress.

"Toph," said Sokka with offense. "Calm down," he insisted with a tired breath of concern, patting his palms against her plated biceps. "I'm sorry, but...Aang's right. You're not yourself right now - it's been a crazy day. This entire week has...-" Toph's face twitched in reproach at his words. "-...taken its toll on all of us. Let's let Katara watch over Lin tonight. The Council and I will help clean up this mess. _You_ should go back home and rest." Sokka rubbed his dry thumb across Toph's face, clearing up the tear trails that had appeared moments earlier. "I'll stop by this evening. We can...go out for tea. Relax."

"Fine," Toph huffed, pulling herself away from Sokka and stalking off. Making her leave, she waved a careless wrist up in the air at them as her farewell. She was sorely tempted in her aggressive mindset to toss out a 'Good day, _Twinkle-Toes_' just to irritate Aang, but her conscience managed to hold this inside.

Aang and Sokka watched her for a few moments, and when it seemed that she was going to heed their advice, the two of them made the trek back to City Hall. There'd no-doubt be some questions that needed answering at this point, and a small crowd could be seen forming at the hall's entrance.

"Sokka," said Aang to his companion. "Katara and I are _worried _about her..."

"I know," Sokka sighed. "Believe me, my sister has chatted my ear off about it. I'm worried, too."

* * *

**A/N: ****At the time of this posting, Michael and Bryan (creators of Avatar) have stated that Book 3 of Legend of Korra will involve some focus on Lin and "her family," whom we will supposedly learn a lot more about. While my intent with Esteemed is to follow canon as closely as possible, I do want to explore somewhat more mature themes and more complex narrative ideas, while keeping it appropriate for a teen-and-up audience. That said, depending on what new story we learn next year, I may incorporate those ideas into this work and retcon some things if necessary - or I may just keep going with what I have produced up until that point to maintain the story's intended direction; I might write a spin-off story with a similar concept based on the new canon we will learn.**

**A collection of fan art for this story project can already be found at the project's DA group, #Esteemed-Beifongs, or in the 'Esteemed' Favourites folder of my DA account, Destiny-Smasher.  
**

**You can also find the full gallery and follow all project updates on the Facebook page (Search for 'Esteemed' or 'Esteemed Beifongs')  
Facebook(dotcom)/EsteemedBeifongs**


	2. Denial

**A/N: DA user SqueakyE did a sketch commission for this chapter. You can find it here: fav . me / d6jlj3g**

* * *

**Esteemed  
**_Denial_

* * *

-119 ASC; Winter-  
-Toph's age: 31-

* * *

_I don't want this. I never wanted this._

_How did I let this happen?_

_Is this real? If this is a real thing, what am I going to do?_

The brain of Toph Beifong was being flooded from both sides that evening: one side by a stream of dreadful thoughts, the other by a steady trickling of saké. Her mind's meanderings ran ice cold while the saké was piping hot. The rice wine stung at the edges of her throat on the way down, a masochistic delight in her self-loathing state.

Her home was just as quiet that evening as it generally was. Its thick stone walls shielded her ears from the usual torrent of noise emanating from the nearby city streets. But this didn't stop her sensitive feet from _feeling _the hundreds of thousands of vibrations in any given minute. She had kicked up her feet onto an adjacent kitchen chair to relieve her sore soles from that ever-present static of movement, a heavy fog of motion constantly surrounding her abode. It was this escape from sounds and vibrations, friends and co-workers, which left Toph's mind with nothing else to focus on but the empty, sick feeling in her stomach and the swelling regret.

The gentle crackling of flames from Toph's fireplace was dying down, and Toph fumbled her hand through the air in its direction. Her chi connected lazily with her fire iron. In her intoxicated state, she strained to focus her energies into the minerals contained within the iron - she used it to stoke at the coals she could sense beneath her half-full pot of boiling water. A pewter container rested within the bubbling liquid, staying nice and hot without boiling the drink inside it. Boiled saké wasn't preferred, after all. It had taken Toph a bit of practice to get the handle of heating her saké on her own, but using hot coals - a substance she could actually detect - had made things a lot easier. Toph appreciated the independence of tending to her own affairs, just as she had for so long before settling down in Republic City.

Lapping at the last droplets of the saké in her pewter cup, Toph sighed with some satisfaction, haphazardly levitating her stoking iron back to its approximate resting location. It clattered to the stone floor, her tired and drunken mind unable to effectively bend as she was normally capable of. She snorted out a laugh in spite of her own clumsiness and groaned, stretching her body out to relax itself a bit. She took in a deep breath, scratching at her stomach beneath her sleeveless tunic.

After a few minutes of half-asleep relaxation, Toph sniffed in air, her chest expanding as she woke her body back up. There was still alcohol to be had.

With a grunt, Toph dropped her legs from her marble table, letting calloused heels smack against the rock floor. She pushed her abdomen up from its laid back position and rubbed her sore palms across her pants and over her thighs. Her head was throbbing a bit - she suddenly realized that the tension she was feeling against her head was because her hair was still up in a bun from work. She untied her hairdo and let the greasy mess of hair fall across her back and shoulders. Already hunched over her knees, Toph found herself getting distracted again by her thoughts.

_What an idiot you are. What were you thinking?  
Oh, that's right. You _weren't _thinking.  
So what happens when you trust men like that?  
Exactly. They strip the meat off your bones and leave your remains to rot._

Having re-irritated herself, Toph rubbed the crust from her eyes and pushed herself up from her chair of upturned earth. On her feet, Toph suddenly felt the full effect of the alcohol she had already consumed. The world was a fuzzy mess beneath her toes, each vibration unclear and deformed. Her legs wobbled, and she smirked at her own tipsiness, her muscles relaxed. Toph flicked her wrist behind her, pulling her pewter saké cup into her grip.

Toph went about the careful act of using her bending powers to levitate her heated saké bottle toward her and pour herself another small cup of the stuff. She didn't place her hands on the bottle directly, but could feel its heat radiating against her skin as she filled her cup back up. She could sense some stray droplets patter against the floor in her sluggish spill. Toph's bending grip on the bottle wavered a bit, but she managed to place the container on her table. Toph sucked down the cup's contents in one shot before plunking back down into her earthen seat with a yawn. She was too sleepy to get her legs back up onto her table, so she opted to lean back and kick one ankle across the opposing knee.

An undetermined period of time passed in which Toph slipped into a relaxed nap - sleep drove away the pain and anger.

The sound of three firm knocks rattled from Toph's door, shattering her peaceful period of solitude.

"_What_?!" she bellowed, not at all keen on her tranquility being disturbed. Three more knocks rang out from the wooden door, practically piercing Toph's inebriated eardrums. "I'm comin'," she huffed, clambering over to her front door. She nearly tripped over her tea table while crossing the space between her resting spot and her door.

Who was it, coming to pester her? Her mind and body numbed, Toph couldn't quite detect the identity of the person standing just beyond her door. If it was one of her officers come to advise her of some emergency, she would not be at all pleased.

Toph twisted her hand through the air, unlocking the mechanism within her door. Another quick gesture against the metalwork of its handle eased the door open, and Toph pulled it wide by tugging at its sanded, smooth surface.

"Yea?" Toph greeted, hand clamped over the edge of her door. Her eyes were closed, head bobbed beneath a ratty mess of shaggy black hair.

"Toph?" An all-too-familiar sigh of disapproval. It was Katara.

"Ooooo-_kay_," Toph puffed out in impatience, stepping back from her door as she pressed her knuckles into her hips. She already knew where this was going. "Whatcha want?"

"I figured I'd check in with you before I headed back...-" Katara trailed off as she entered. She was put off after studying Toph's mannerisms and the scent lingering the bleary-faced police chief. Katara's lips fell open slightly and she closed the front door behind her. Glaring at her friend with furrowed brows, Katara demanded in a hushed voice, "Toph, are you..._drinking_?"

Katara was now examining Toph's exhausted face with all due suspicion.

"What?" Toph grunted, playing dumb. "No," the word slowly spilled out as Toph tried to push her eyebrows down low. That would make her look confused, right?

Katara cast a glance over Toph's shoulder, noting the distinctly shaped bottle and cup on the table. It wasn't tea, she was sure of that.

"For someone who can tell when folks are lying...-" Katara marched right past Toph, whose body tightened up. "-...you are horrible at doing it, yourself."

Before Toph could make much of a retaliation to her friend's snooping, Katara surveyed the steaming bottle resting against the marble table. It was still warm from earlier, she realized. With a gentle caress of her hand, she summoned up a tendril of the stuff Toph had been consuming. A quick sniff confirmed Katara's suspicions, and she let the barely warm saké splash right back into its nearly empty bottle.

"_Argh_," Toph growled in defeat, having realized she'd been found out. She reached out her arm and willed the pewter bottle Katara had just been examining from the healer's grip into her own hand. Katara rolled up her eyes and approached her intoxicated ally.

"What's it matter to you what I do in my own home?" Toph demanded, taking another sip from the container.

Katara placed a consoling hand on Toph's shoulder. Oh, great. The patronizing was about to commence.

"Toph..." Yep. That was the patronizing tone, all right. "I can understand if this is all difficult for you to take in, but...-"  
"But nothin'," Toph interrupted, crossing one arm and latching it onto the other. She wriggled the bottle in her hand at Katara, shaking the woman's motherly touch off of her skin.

Toph slumped a few steps away from her concerned friend before letting her body drop onto its behind in her living room space. She leaned her elbow over her low-set tea table and puffed out a deep, irritable breath before slamming her stone bottle against the ornately carved table.

"If yer just here to lecture me-" Toph began, pointing out an angry finger at Katara with a bobbed head. "-you can cram it."

She could sense Katara's looming presence, probably glaring at her with that uptight, appalled manner.

"I can't _believe _you, Toph," Katara scolded. Yup, there it was, that tone Toph hated. "How much have you _had? _When did you start...-?"

"Juss a _few_," Toph defended in a mumble. Her stomach gurgled with discomfort as heartburn reared its ugly head. Toph instinctively grabbed at her gut. "_Urgh, _maybe...more n' a few," she added begrudgingly.

Katara gawked at Toph for a moment, watching the woman groan. Toph looked ready to hurl. Oh, boy. Some things never changed, especially with Toph, it seemed. Katara had her work cut out for her, but she refused to give up. First things first, she decided: they needed to purge that alcohol from Toph's system. As Katara explored the nearby kitchen area, an open room nearby, she noted a tipped over pewter bottle sitting on the floor - yes, indeed, some other form of booze, from the smell. Katara's disbelief flared, boiling together with rage.

"What are you _thinking_?" Katara groaned across the house as she set the discarded bottle upright on a stone counter. She then surveyed Toph's kitchen. One wall was entirely occupied by hanging pots and pans - easily accessible to the blind woman with her rare skill of metal manipulation. Katara grabbed the biggest pot she spotted, yanked it off the wall hook, and whisked herself to Toph, who was resting her face in her palm, elbow propped on the tea table.

With a loud '_clang_,' Katara dropped the pot at Toph's feet, startling her friend from her stupor.

"I'm going to go get you some water," Katara sighed. She stood for a moment in baffled fury, one hand on her hip, the other against her forehead.

Katara approached the boiling pot at Toph's fire place and lulled some of its liquid out. Chilling it down with her breath-infused ability, Katara placed the liquid in the pouch she commonly carried on her belt. Katara considered putting the flames out, but opted against it, given the wintry weather outside.

Toph, meanwhile, was left on her living room floor to wallow in shame, embarrassment, and the woozy mixture of intoxication. Her head was swimming, her muscles relaxed after a hard day at work, and yet the pain was still not gone. Katara's presence had served to slap Toph in the face with the possibilities of her situation.

Katara's footsteps could be felt approaching Toph again. This sensation caused Toph to realize that in her stupor she had begun sliding the metal pot around with her bending. Back and forth, gently, a hiabitual movement - like rubbing two feet together. Toph let the pot sit still, allowing her head to droop and sway with drunken satisfaction. Her stomach burned at her from the inside again, but she didn't let on this time.

Katara stormed back up to Toph, who could hear the sloshing of water in the woman's ever-handy pouch.

"Open your mouth," Katara advised, no-nonsense about her intentions.

Toph huffed air at her floppy bangs before cocking her head to the side and letting her jaw fall open. Katara skillfully pulled out a thin stream of the water she'd just prepared and slid some into Toph's mouth. Toph instinctively closed her lips and swallowed. They repeated this process for a minute or so, until Toph's stomach began writing again. Before Toph knew it, she could feel her stomach and chest tighten, her throat inciting a gag reflex. She grabbed the pot from her side and held it up to her face. She heaved out the contents of her stomach in a watery, smelly, acidic mess. The sensation was most unpleasant, especially since it was comprised partially in alcohol - it had burned going down, and it was burning coming back up. Toph could feel her messy, unkempt hair getting laced in her own vomit as she huddled over her pot.

Seconds later, as Toph choked and sputtered from her physical reaction, she sensed her bangs being tickled in a most peculiar fashion - Katara seemed to be bending the traces of liquid from her drunken friend's hair, dropping them into the pot with the rotten batch of juices. Toph could sense Katara's complete disapproval of this sight, and felt a pang of regret stirring in the extra space she had just made in her gut. Katara was suddenly sitting at Toph's side, cautiously pulling back the blind woman's hair and holding it up just in time for Toph to puke again.

Her barfing session complete, Toph did feel somewhat better, though not really any less dizzy or exhausted.

Without a word, Katara scooped up the stench-ridden pot and took it outside, leaving the door open behind her to invite a cold winter breeze into the house. Toph's body shuddered at the feeling at first, but the fresh air was pleasant against her hot face. Toph found the energy to scoot herself into a more proper seating position in front of her tea table. With her head cleared a little from the purging and cold air, Toph was hit with sudden concern: old Sugar Queen was going to come back, and despite their ages, Toph was expecting a heavy-handed lecture. With any luck, though, perhaps Toph's surrogate sister could also convince the police chief that this was _not, _in fact, the end of the world. It certainly felt like it when she considered Katara's warning from earlier that day.

Toph was so drenched in her own dreary thoughts that she didn't notice Katara re-enter until the bitter chill of the incoming breeze disappeared. Katara placed the rinsed out pot back on the table and sat down across from her friend.

"You should drink more water," Katara advised sternly, readying to repeat the process from before.

"That didn't go so well last time," Toph grumbled, leaning back on her palms.

"_Toph_," Katara snapped primly, her patience wearing thin. "You need to wash out your system." A brief moment of tension followed as Katara leveled a glob of water before Toph's chin, the woman's head cocked back in disagreement. Katara snipped, "I'm not doing this for my own good, you know...Or for _yours, _even."

"And what's _that _supposed to mean?" Toph grunted, lazily propping her head upright. She left her mouth open to allow the liquid to enter, and sloshed it around between her teeth, rinsing them of the traces of what she'd just thrown up. Much to Katara's chagrin, the woman swallowed after this act.

"You know _exactly _what that means," Katara seethed. Toph smirked at this, sliding her feet back and forth a little. Things were still fuzzy, but with Katara so close to her, Toph could sense the woman's heartbeat escalating with fury. It still brought Toph Beifong a bit of delight after all of these years to press her friends' buttons. At the very least, it gave her brain something else to do for a few fleeting seconds, instead of confront the actual matter at hand.

"Just because _you _think I might be pregnant doesn't mean I instantly _am_," Toph declared, opting to pursue denial.

"And just because _you _choose to ignore me and binge drink, doesn't mean you couldn't be doing something you'll regret."

"_Rargh_," Toph growled in frustrated despair. "This just...isn't _right, _I mean, I didn't ask for this."

"Toph, Hun, you might remember that I _just _gave birth to a _third _kid not so long ago - I didn't ask for _that, _either."

"But you n' Twinkle-Toes _wanted _to have a family," Toph pointed out.

"Well..._Yes, _I suppose that's the difference, then," conceded Katara, feeding Toph another gulp of water.

"Right, and...good for _you _guys," Toph huffed. "I don't _want _that. I've got enough to deal with these days." She flicked up her wrist for Katara's benefit, trying to make clear her dissatisfaction. "I don't need monkey feathers on top of monkey feathers here, understand?"

Katara took a moment to formulate her reply, and Toph continued to accept the drink provided.

"Is this because he left you?" Katara surmised solemnly. She remained unconvinced that Toph's brief entanglement with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named hadn't left a dent in the woman's ego, much less her abandonment issues. There were reasons Toph Beifong always wanted to 'carry her own weight' and Katara knew full well that situations such as that one had not helped to assuage this mentality.

Katara watched her friend's face contort with displeasure, wrinkles forming at the edges of the woman's mouth. Toph could feel the frown happening, that sensation her face took when she dwelt on painful ideas. She suppressed it, laying herself down on her back to disconnect her face from what perceived to be Katara's line of sight.

"You should sit upright," Katara winced. "Unless you _want _to start feeling sick again..."

Without a word, Toph thrust out her fists in a steady motion. The earthen floor beneath her lifted her body back up, and she left the chunk of stone upended to serve as back support.

"I'm trying to _help _you, Toph," Katara eased.

"Yea, I don't see how rubbing my failed love life in my face counts as _helping_."

"I _meant_ with this kid you're going to have."

"There _is _no 'kid!' OK?" Toph's tone had spiked with more aggression she'd intended. The mixed thoughts of this potential pregnancy blended with the aching sensation she was still keeping sealed within. The metal bracelet around Toph's right wrist began to shiver against her skin, reacting to the intense emotions emanating from the earthbender. In a bit of a fitful gesture, Toph detached the old meteor bracelet from her arm, slapping it against her table and leaving it solidified as a mishapen blob of rock. Toph tried to steady herself, still woozy from her drinking. "Let's stop talking about this _thing _like it's-...like it's actually _real _until it..._is._"

Katara raised a brow at Toph's halfway mark of logic.

"It's not a _thing_," Katara disputed. "It's a...a living _being, _growing inside of you! A little..._you_."

"_Ha_! Yea, that's-...No, that's rich. A little _me, _she says..." Toph sighed deeply after her muttering, and pressed her head into the vertical rock pillow against her body. "I think the world's probably fine with _just _one of 'me' in it, don't you?"

Katara glared at her friend's nonchalant dismissal, all the more irate that her stare went unseen.

"I know that...your work can be really demanding," Katara tried to sympathize. "And so I could understand your hesitation, especially without a father to help care for the child."

"I don't _need _help caring for a kid - especially since there _isn't one_."

"Yet," Katara testily reminded.

"There won't _be _one," Toph further pressed. In the irritation of the moment, Toph wasn't even thinking through _why _she was so insistent on this point.

Katara, her lips pursed and eyes wide with rage, tossed up her hands, shaking her head.

"You're _right, _Toph," she spat out. "There _won't _be one, because you're going to kill it before it can live long enough to get out of your body and find someone who actually _respects _the value of life."

A heavy quiet weighed down on the two, Toph's face flushed pink. The police chief's fuzzy head, floating in a pot of rice beer, was boiling with self-directed rage and shame. Katara's self-righteous words stung much more than they normally would, because Toph found herself agreeing with them.

"It baffles me," Katara ranted on, "how you can maintain such an important job, but as soon as you get home it's like you turn back into a teenager."

"_Psh_..." Toph clawed her fingers at her scalp, savoring the gritty bits of dirt that wedged themselves within her nails. "I've had a lot of practice putting on an act for people," Toph noted with some bitterness, recalling her upbringing.

Katara grunted out a sigh, understanding what Toph was referring to.

"And in _case _you haven't noticed," Toph added, "I didn't get my job for...how I _carry _myself - how I act. I got it because of my _skill. _I get things _done, _I make things _happen, _and it shouldn't matter how I act when I come home. I didn't even take this job because I _wanted _to, it just...-" Toph trailed off, blowing at her bangs wistfully as she slumped her head to one side.

"I understand that maybe life here in the city isn't everything you were hoping for," said Katara with some sympathy. "Spirits know I'm glad that we live a bit outside of all of the craziness."

"I bet things are real cushy on your little island getaway home," was Toph's spiteful remark.

"I wouldn't quite call it that," said Katara, doing her best to withhold her irritation. "What I was going to say is that Aang and I take care of each other. I'm not sure if either of us could deal with every one of our responsibilities all on our own."

"That's nice," Toph muttered, pushing out indifference with her tone as she staved off niggling envy. "I'm just fine taking care of myself, though."

"That's..._true_," Katara agreed - Toph could tell from the way this had been said that there was a 'catch.' "You seem to have adjusted to living in your own place, and Sokka tells me that a lot of folks seem to respect the work you've been doing for the city. But Toph...I mean, _look _at yourself, you're-"

"Would if I _could_," Toph snarkily interrupted.

"Sorry," Katara sighed. "I mean, figuratively," she quickly amended her statement. "I'm _worried _about your private life."

"Gee, that's swell, Sweetness, but it's my _private _life, soooo...that means not-everyone's-business."

"Toph..." the waterbender sighed out with exasperation.

"Katara..." the earthbender grumbled back impatiently.

Katara dropped yet another sigh, at a loss of how to get through to her friend. Every attempt would be met with protruding thorns - Toph's approach to this subject was the way of the boar-q-pine, and Katara was tired of getting stabbed today.

"Fine." Katara flicked up a dismissing wrist of frustration, getting up from Toph's floor. "All I'm getting at is that you seem to be making some decisions lately that lead to things you say you don't _want_, so it might be a wise move to let us - your _friends_ - help you out in times like this."

"_Puh_," Toph puffed out, a bit slack-jawed. "Bleeding hog-monkeys," she cursed under her breath, once again scratching at her scalp. "Listen here. It's easy for you and the High-N'-Mighty Avatar to get people to help you out, but the last time I did that, it didn't play out so well for me."

"Toph, if Sokka _knew _about this, I'm certain he'd put aside what happened with you two and do whatever he could to-"  
"I don't _need _him. He made it _perfectly _clear what he thinks of me when he walked out, so I don't even care about that at this point."

"I think you _do_."

"Yea? _I _think you're no psychiatrist, and you should stop trying to figure me out. It's simple: why trust any of you bumbling idiots when I can handle things way better on my own?"

Katara bit down on her bottom lip with silent rage. Despite her heavily-intoxicated system, Toph could clearly make out the sensation of Katara's heart beating in the quiet seconds that followed. Katara was angry, just as Toph had desired. Suddenly, Toph felt remorse in desiring it.

At last, Katara broke the tension.

"So...'_Bumbling idiots._' That's what we are now? For trying to help you out?"

"_Yup._" But Toph's ego was too damn stubborn to give in.

Katara puffed out an indignant laugh through her nose, bewildered at her friend's stark statement.

Toph elaborated.

"I didn't ask for this job. I didn't ask to be tied down to this _charity _project of a town. This place was the brainchild of Twinkle-Toes and Sparky, I didn't give a-"  
"_Avatar _Aang and _Fire Lord _Zuko."

Toph stopped, rubbing her nose with the edge of her wrist. She grunted, shifting her position from her earthen seat. She slid her bare feet against the smooth stone floor of her living quarters, tracking down a rather familiar object.

Katara bitterly pointed out, "We're not _children _anymore, Toph."

"Ah, so...-" Through her wobbly senses, Toph located her target and extended her arm toward it. "-...we're tossin' around titles, are we?" She flicked her hand in a gesture that willed the object toward her.

Katara muttered out, "What? No, I-" but was cut off by the impact of a gold-coated police badge slapping itself into Toph's palm. The badge was lazily wiggled in the air in Katara's direction.

"_Chief of Police _Toph Beifong," the disgruntled woman cockily proclaimed. She folded her fingers around the badge, running her thumb along its surface. "Even your dunder-headed brother is a _Councilman_. And you? I don't-...What _are _you, even? A babysitter?"

"I'm a _caretaker_," Katara defended, her ego being run in the mud by her own friend. "Oh, _and _a teacher."

"Been there, done that."

"And I happen to be considered a master of a specialized bending art."

"_Ha. _I _invented _a specialized bending art."

"I'm also a wife. Basically a doctor. And a _mother _- something you're going to be, soon enough."

"Katara, just drop it," Toph darkly commanded. "I'm _not _going to be a mom. No way."

"Do you _want _me to go over the symptoms again?" Katara posed testily.

Toph groaned through her nose. She was still feeling light-headed from her drinking as she grasped at her forehead with one hand, flinging her badge onto the tea table with the other.

"No," Toph sighed, "I don't want-"  
"Because _you're_ the one who came to _me_ with all of this," said Katara with an indignant shrug.

"Yea, n' that was a mistake-" Toph decided, "-'cuz how sore my tits are is my _own_ problem, so let's just-"  
"I'm _trying _to be here for you, but you're making it really difficult to-"  
"All I asked for was some...medical consultation, nnnnnot...a...bleeding _house call_, and...-"

"I mean, _Spirits, _Toph, do you...do you even know who the _father_ would be?"

Toph let her head sag, her already queasy stomach all the more uneasy at this question she did not even want to consider.

"That's...-" Toph trailed off, scratching at her nose fretfully.

"Because," Katara went on, "from what you've told me...it could be one of a _couple _of people...At least."

"Right," Toph grunted in frustrated admission, her scratching hand sliding up over her forehead.

The fact that Toph had been letting herself vent out some personal details to her old friend Katara was starting to come back to bite her in the ass here. What if Katara broke their pact of privacy? Nah, she would never do that. She could be pushy and stubborn, sure, but so could Toph. Old Sugar Queen was trustworthy, though – the same couldn't be said for her Meat-Head of a brother, _grah_...

Katara finished her thought: "Shouldn't we at least _consider _telling Sokka about this situation? I mean, what if he's-"  
"_No_," Toph concretely decided, crossing her arms around her chest.

"Ohhh..._kay_," Katara slowly breathed out. "What about...the _other, _umm...partner?"

"_Tsh. _I told you: he skipped town. I don't see a point, anyway, he was just a...-" Toph rubbed at her face grumpily, not desiring to dwell on this topic.

"Sooo...-" Katara's head was shaking slightly with disbelief. She shrugged her hands up and let them slap against her lap. "What, then? You're going to just...try raising this child on your own?"

"_If _there's a child at _all_," Toph grumbled.

"You're in total denial over this, aren't you?"

"Katara." Toph pounded the side of her fist into her lap, hunching forward. Her head was hung low, messy hair veiling her grumpy expression. "I..._do not_...want...a kid. OK? Not all of us are _overflowing _with motherly love like you are...Frankly, I don't think I'm cut out for that crud."

"Listen, I _know _this is all a difficult situation to take in, and we don't really know what will happen here. But _please, _Toph - I seriously think you're pregnant. Take it as a medical consultation, or take it as my advice as your _friend_, it doesn't matter, just...please take this into consideration until we know otherwise."

Toph blew out a deep huff, plopping her elbow on her short-legged tea table. She let her face fall into the upended palm.

"I don't want to deal with this," Toph confessed, her voice straddling the line between anguish and dismissal. "I don't."

"I know," Katara acknowledged, closing the distance to her frustrated companion. "But you're not in this alone."

Toph sniffed up loose mucus, her head starting to throb with pain.

"Come," Katara eased, placing a hand on Toph's shoulder. Toph's abdomen twitched with alarm at the contact, as she hadn't been paying attention to the vibrations around her. "You need a hug," Katara concluded.

Toph disagreed with this notion, but let her friend embrace her briefly, anyway.

Katara assured the would-be mother, "Things will turn out all right. Don't worry."

In begrudging silence, Toph endured the warm, soothing touch of Katara's hug. The Water Tribe woman's hands shared a certain kind of calloused texture to them that reminded one of a certain dolt-brained Councilman. But where his hands would be more frisky and hungry, here Katara's were healing and supportive.

"I'm not _worried_," Toph stated, though she herself wasn't certain if this true or not. Deep down, she wanted to earnestly believe Katara's words - Katara, more or less like an older sister to her at this point. Toph supposed that if the ever-motherly Katara had her back, she shouldn't have anything to fear.

This didn't stop Toph from fearing her prospective future, all the same.

* * *

EDIT: The third chapter of Esteemed is told from Lin's perspective, and as such, Fanfiction dotnet readers can find it in a separate story thread under The Legend of Korra (since FF doesn't allow proper connection between the two series). You will find it in my profile.


	3. Shiver

**A/N: In case you missed it, FF dotnet readers can read Toph and Lin chapters of Esteemed in two separate story threads (since this site doesn't join ATLA and LOK into a single series). This is actually the fourth written chapter of Esteemed. You can find the third in the thread 'Esteemed (Lin Beifong)' under my profile.  
**

**This chapter takes place during events of 'The Promise,' so if you have yet to read it, a lot of the context won't make complete sense. Since there is a certain plot-ish kind of point that I think is a big deal for the story I want to tell, I've copied some dialogue from the comic to make sure this device is made apparent, while also adding in extra narrative and dialogue around existing pieces from the comic. A lot of these earlier chapters are directly connected to scenes from the series, but most chapters for this series will not follow that format.  
**

* * *

**Esteemed  
**_Shiver_

* * *

-101 ASC; Summer-  
-Toph's age: 13-

* * *

Their shouts reverberated off of the dojo walls, their movements sending subtle vibrations across the stone floor.

"**YAAAH!**"

Feet were steadied and fists were thrust out. But the coins did not move from their positions, wedged atop their stalks of bamboo.

"Nothing," sighed Ho Tun, the largest of the three. "No movement at all."

_Stop dragging your knuckles, fatty._

Penga, the youngest and tiniest, gave her coin a ragged glare.

"How am I supposed to impress my _boyfriend?!_" she squealed through clenched teeth of frustration.

_Tsh. __Yea, your 'boyfriend' my ass, little missy._

"I hate failure," muttered Moo - 'the Dark One' - with the same unenthused tone he always spoke in.

_Cry me a river, you lump of 'blah.'_

"This is _bad!_" cried Ho Tun. He slapped his palms against his cheeks as he bemoaned, "I can't concentrate on forms with doom coming in _two days_!"

"I'm sick of hearing about doom!" Penga stamped her foot as she pointed an angry finger at her fellow student. The shake her stomp sent across the dojo's stone floor was startling to Toph's tired feet. "I'm not practicing with you anymore!" Ugh. And her whiny, squeaky little voice sure wasn't gaining any sympathy from the Sifu.

"I hate...-!" Moo folded his arms with bitter defeat. "I hate...all of this!"

Toph's head was throbbing from the stress of the situation, compounded by what irritating little dungballs these students were being. They had two more days until Kunyo arrived - his students were to battle Toph's students "to the sit" (rather than 'to the death'). Toph had occupied Kunyo's dojo in his leave due to the Harmony Restoration Movement, but seeing that Zuko had apparently lost some marbles recently, the movement had been withdrawn, and Fire Nation forces were returning to Yu Dao, the largest of the colonies. Toph had selected Yu Dao as her base of operations for multiple reasons, but primarily because it hosted a blend of Fire Nation culture (which meant lots of metal) and Earth Kingdom citizens (which meant lots of potential metalbenders).

However, if her students couldn't prove their worth against Kunyo's firebenders, Toph would be left disgraced, a failure of a teacher, and per her agreement with Kunyo, she would be obligated to leave the dojo building. At this rate, however, Toph was losing hope in her students and her capabilities as a mentor. Maybe metalbending wasn't something she could _teach _to these dunderheads.

As Penga yammered her complaints at Ho Ton, Toph and Sokka observed in the next room. Toph sensed Sokka's body slide slightly, rotating to face her. She could feel him raising his arm, probably gesturing toward what she imagined was a pathetic sight.

"So, these were the most qualified students you could find, huh?" Sokka wondered. He sounded especially doubtful, and for good reason.

"It wasn't me," Toph insisted, rolling up her right sleeve. She revealed to Sokka the tightly wound ring of meteorite stone wrapped around her bicep. "It was _this_!"

"Ooooh! Space bracelet!" Sokka sounded happy to see the little treasure. Toph had constantly kept it with her all year, a sort of souvenir of her time with her friends in the Fire Nation, ending the war. But also, it being a token gift from Sokka to her, she couldn't help but think of it as a symbol of her friendship with the Water Tribe good. His enthusiasm at the bracelet made Toph's inside bubble up just a little with delight. However, Sokka's mind immediately went in a different direction as he whimpered, "Oh, how I miss you, Space Sword!"

Eeh. Those bubbles in Toph's stomach popped. The subject of 'Space Sword' was one that Toph, even a year after the war had ended, couldn't properly formulate her thoughts on. There was guilt, gratitude, regret, joy, all bundled up into one mish-mash of..._feelings. _Toph didn't much like to dwell on the idea. She chose not to acknowledge Sokka's whimpering statement - his reminder of Space Sword, of the day she'd almost died, of the way he clung to her _fingertips _in desperation to protect her, the way that Space Sword was lost on account of _her _not being strong enough to save herself at just the wrong time, the-...Wait. It was doing that _thing _again. Toph's bracelet was...shivering. Just barely, but it was there. Rather than dwell on this fact, much less on why it had happened, Toph opted to carry on, ignoring Sokka's embellished agony.

Toph flicked her left wrist, willing the stone jewelry to slide off her arm and re-close itself in its normally neat ring in her left hand. She began twirling it around her index finger as she spoke, pacing thoughtfully toward the tiny school's front entrance.

"About a year ago," she told Sokka, "I noticed that every now and then, when I was in public, my bracelet would shiver the tiniest bit."

Having reached the front steps of her self-proclaimed academy, Toph caught the whirling rock in her palm, squeezing it tightly into a ball. She folded her hands behind her back, taking in the fresh summer air. As Sokka arrived at her side, she appreciated the particular flavor his scent added to the collection of smells that had become stale around the dojo since her taking up residence there. She took in a deep breath as a weird part of her thought, '_Sure would be nice if that smell of his stuck around for a while._'

Bleh. What a stupid thing to think. How come all of a sudden she was thinking dumb crud like that? Sokka's idiocy was rubbing off of her, probably.

Confused as to why her mind had gone there, Toph continued her explanation about the bracelet, rubbing her thumb along the round rock behind her back.

"I could only feel it when I was really paying attention," she cited, pressing her thumb into the stone and bending a hole into it. "Eventually, I figured out that this would happen when someone around me got _super emotional._ So I had an idea. Maybe these people who could move my bracelet could also be _metalbenders._" Toph took in a sharp intake of air through her nose when she realized she'd been playing with the space stone, and stopped, crushing it between clenched fingers. "I started recruiting them to my school."

She regaled to Sokka how she met Ho Tun freaking out over a bug in his soup, of Penga getting worked up over shoes, and of Moo focusing his quiet rage on passersby. She explained how in each of these instances, her bracelet would begin to shiver due to what Toph perceived as subtle, subconscious earthbending of those who were getting emotional around her. She had concluded that if they had this effect on her bracelet without even realizing it, they might have the potential to get the grasp of metalbending easier than the average student.

"That sounds about right," Sokka muttered, accepting Toph's theory. "Katara found out she was a waterbender because the ice would crack whenever I made her mad-..._er, _whenever she got _super emotional._"

Toph re-formed her meteor rock into its familiar shape - a bracelet around her arm. As she approached the front door of the school to head back inside, she could feel it vibrating against her skin from the swell of frustration of her students.

"Yeah," Toph said in reply to Sokka. "but there's a problem with finding students that way. Think about it." She opened the door, spilling out an irritable collection of noise from where her students bickered at each other. "What kind of people get super emotional in public?!" she growled, her fists clenched as she stomped inside.

Sokka followed her, guessing an answer.

"Uh, crazy people?"

"_Crazy people!_" Toph roared, thrusting up her balled fists in aggravation.

Her students were so preoccupied with their squabbling that they didn't even seem to notice.

Toph could yell and shout and stomp her feet, but at the end of the day, her Lily Livers needed to be self-motivated for change transpire.

Sokka was here now, though. He was an Idea Guy. Surely he could come up with something. She was at her wit's end. At this rate, _she _might end up a crazy person, herself.

* * *

Toph huffed out a deep sigh, her face buried in her arms. She was hunched over the steps of her school. That is to say, the school she'd _stolen, _and couldn't so much as find competent pupils for, much less _teach _anyone anything. The night air was still a bit humid, and she could hear a cricket's chirping.

Sokka's most recent venture had failed, marking the end of their intensive three day training period. She'd followed his advice to the last word, they'd planned it out perfectly, but no dice. Sokka didn't _always _know how to solve things. It was a bitter pill to swallow, but it was what it was.

Her mind jogging in circles, trying to figure out what had gone wrong, Toph growled to herself, scratching her nails at her forehead through sweaty bangs.

This was all so incredibly frustrating. Toph was used to carrying her own weight, or at _least _having reliable people like Katara and Aang to work alongside. This business of putting her faith in these delinquents? She hated this - yes, probably even more than 'The Dark One' did. At least _he _didn't have some kind of reputation to lose. Or a building, for that matter. Toph had stolen - _er, _occupied this dojo fair and square. She wasn't keen on losing the property, especially with how close it was to Yu Dao. This was a great location, being close enough to a bustling town for convenience but far enough outside of said town for Toph to have some freedom and privacy.

If Sifu Kunyo were to win their arranged duel, it wouldn't just mean that Toph was out a school building - it would mean she was out a home once again. And _then _where would she go? The almighty Avatar didn't have a use for her anymore, and Katara and Sokka were basically his valets or something at this point. And Toph certainly wasn't keen on crying back to her parents with her tail between her legs. Her letter from the summer prior remained unanswered. Part of her wanted to write it off as some mistake - something had happened to Sokka's bird, or her parents hadn't figured out how to send a reply...but they were Beifongs. An incredibly rich and wealthy family. And Toph had been doing her best to make her metalbending academy known in the region. The _Beifong _Metalbending Academy. That ought to have gotten her parents' attention, right?

And yet no answer, no visit, no messenger...no nothing. For months, just nothing.

Then again, if Toph was really such a failure that the _only _student she was capable of teaching was an ancient spiritual being who had already learned earthbending hundreds of times over, then maybe her school wasn't worthy of their attention to begin with.

_Useless. This has all been useless. I'm a waste. I'm no_ real _Sifu_._  
_

_Sure, I 'taught' one student. Aang - _Avatar _Aang. Of _course _he'd be able to __learn earthbending, because he already _did _learn it, a hundred times in past lives._

_All I did was get him off his ass and remind him of how to do it. Maybe he didn't need me at all. _

_I've gone through the same steps and then-some with three different students, and none of them have taken up the skill._

_And why would they? I didn't take them under my wing 'cuz they were battle-hardened, or disciplined. I did it because they were crazy, emotional nutjobs._

_What was I _thinking? _What is wrong with me? What a damned stupid idea! Rrrgh!  
_

_I know I was kind of joking around when I told Sokka why I wanted to become a teacher, but there was actually some truth there, and he just blew it off like some big joke._

_That's Sokka, I guess - always blowing it all off for a laugh. But I'm not _always _joking around, ya Meat-Head._

_Where am I supposed to go if this doesn't pan out? Ugh, I'll be back where I was a year ago. Aang and Katara don'y need me anymore, and I don't even know what Sokka's been up to, but I'm sure there's no place for me in his plans. I can't just go back to my parents...No way. Aghhh...That'd be like walking back into a cage._

_Walking back into that metal box that I broke out of in the first place._  
_Walking back to Mom and Dad, disgraced, shaming our family's name after all my big talk?  
Dishonorable. It'd just prove to them that I can't take care of myself, after all._  
_I can't go back to that._

Her mind started filling with memories of her parents - of the good little girl she'd been dog-trained to act like, of their rules and their coddling and their pressure and the pain it brought on. Toph was presently tuning out the world around her, but this surge of stress and bad memories was causing her arm bracelet to shudder just a bit. Her nose wrinkled as her face formed into a frown, and she sighed through her nose. Her eyes were damp at the ends, and this aggravated her. It made her upset to be noticing that she was upset in the first place. _Argh, _that didn't even make sense, how _stupid, _something must've been physically _wrong _with her, because _why _would-

Toph felt her face flush with the heat of blood as she noticed the vibrations of Sokka's weight padding toward her position on the front steps of her self-proclaimed academy. His presence was accompanied by that cricket's chirping. Toph rubbed the ball of her right foot along the stone step as Sokka drew close. Her feet could sense Sokka's body, his heartbeat, the cricket's vibrations off in the grass up ahead, her students back inside, scuffling around within their rooms...probably packing up to _leave, _no doubt, given what a pathetic excuse for a Sifu they had been putting up with.

"Toph!" Sokka called to her from behind as he passed through the front door. "There you are!"

_Here I am_...

Toph didn't budge, instead trying to sniffle up her forming sob of defeat as quietly as possible. Sokka's body plopped down beside her, which was at least a welcoming thing to sense.

"Don't give up yet, okay?" he tried to encourage. "I just got a _brand-new _best idea ever! What if I rig it so that-"  
"You ever think about metal?" Toph posed solemnly, her face still veiled between her arms.

"Nope," Sokka casually replied. "When I have extra thinking time, I usually spend it on food. Meat, specifically."

_Oh, ha-ha. Bleeding hog-monkeys, can we be serious for two seconds here?_

Toph tilted her head up slightly, breathing in some fresh air.

She explained her thoughts to Sokka.

"Metal is just a part of earth that's been purified and refined. But how does it become like that? By getting heated, melted, and pounded. By going through _pressure _and _pain._" Toph twisted her face away from Sokka as her mouth managed to form what her thoughts had in the moments before his arrival. "I discovered metalbending in a tiny metal cell, when Master Yu and Xin Fu were taking me back to my parents. That whole trip, all I could think about was how my parents expected me to be something I'm _not. _Sure, they wanted me to be helpless, but they also wanted me to be a cultured, well-mannered, soft-spoken little lady." She huffed air through her nose, her face contorting with bitterness. "All I felt was _pressure _and _pain._"

Toph was grateful that Sokka had shut up his stupid trap for once. It was like he was actually paying attention to what she was saying. Like he was taking her seriously. She turned her face toward his and spoke directly.

"When I brought Ho Tun, Penga, and 'The Dark One' to this school, I expected them to become _metalbenders! _I was gonna make them tough enough to move the most stubborn part of the most stubborn element!" Toph grunted in self-loathing pressing her palm over her face. "I expected them to be something they're _not._"

Toph stood up on her two bare feet. She could detect those Lily Livers - er, _students _- were huddled in the building behind her, holding their luggage. They could probably hear what she was saying, but she didn't even care. She was a failure, an idiot, and a hypocrite. She'd let them down. She hadn't taught them diddly doo-dah. She's just...yelled at them a lot, and somehow expected results.

"How is what I'm doing to _them _different from what my parents did to _me? _Maybe the Beifong Metalbending Academy is just a way for me to pass all that pressure and pain to someone else..."

"No, Toph," Sokka eased. "That's not what this place is at all..." Toph's feet told her that he was sincere. She couldn't decide if this was frustrating because he didn't understand what she was trying to say, or encouraging because he was still backing her up despite her idiocy.

Toph's arm was shuddering ever-so-slightly once again. Sokka, her students, her _parents. _She was a failure to all of them. Her stomach was tied up in knots. Here she was, professing this realization in front of Sokka, one of her closest friends. It was embarrassing. She felt weak, and foolish, and...just..._argh. _Her eyes were welling up now, and Sokka didn't need to see that!

She marched off back into the dojo, dismissing Sokka's mild words of support.

As Toph retreated into the building, she declared darkly, "When Kunyo comes tomorrow, I'm gonna go up to him and _sit down. _He can have his school back."

* * *

_Metal._

Tears. Burning. Heat. Fire.

_Metal. _Pressing, cooking her alive, fire. Agh, her _feet. _The hot metal. The empty expanse below.

That was a _lot _of fire down there, wasn't it?

Shrieking, grunting, shouts of pain and alarm.

_Metal. _Pressure and pain.

Toph was dangling, hanging on a thread of Meat. His Meat - his arm.

_"Hang on, Toph!"_

_"Aye-aye, Captain!"_

_Metal. _Fire. Heat. Burning. Tears.

Clanging, banging, slicing.

_"Bye, Space Sword..."_

Slipping...slipping...! No!

_"Nnghh...! I don't think Boomerang is comin' back, Toph...It looks like this is the end."_

Tears. Pressure and pain.

Slipping...slipping.

Shuddering banging, metal on metal.

**Pressure and pain.**

His fingertips' desperate grip disconnects from hers.

Falling..._Falling?_

_"Suki!"_ his voice from above. Cheerful?  
Happy to see Suki. Leaving Toph behind.

_Falling!? Falling!_

Nothing holding her, no strong arm, no determined fingertips...No sensation but wind - hot, burning wind.

**Falling! Falling!**

"_Gurgh-?!_"

Toph's heart stopped for a second, jarring her from her sleep with a gasp.

Toph choked on her own saliva, coughing and pounding at her chest as she regained her bearings. She rose up on one hand, holding herself up from the bare stone floor she had been sleeping upon. It was a bit chilly, just the way she liked it, but she didn't feel so well. Her stomach had an awful emptiness to it. She was warm, so warm...She pushed off the light blanket she'd been under.

_Argh, _ow, and what was with the soreness on her right arm? Toph's bicep was stinging, the skin a bit raw. Sort of like a friction burn, maybe?

Toph realized she was sweaty, her skin was clammy and cold. But her head was also throbbing, and her heart was slamming against her ribs.

Dazed, and not entirely awake, Toph's hand on the stone tile could detect the small tremors of a figure approaching. It smelled like Sokka. _Ah, _right, she had offered him refuge in the teacher's spare bunk while Toph had occupied the floor on the other side of the room.

She groaned in discomfort and clamped her pounding forehead as Sokka's steps grew close. The source of her chafed skin suddenly revealed itself to her in that moment: she realized she was wearing her meteor bracelet, and it was vibrating. Like, a _lot. _More than usual. Not enough to create an audible sound - still just a shiver - but it was enough to catch her attention, and it was obviously the cause of her sore arm. Had her nightmare been making her...super emotional? What had she even been dreaming about?

"Toph...?" In her half-asleep stupor she could hear his voice. It was...calming.

The light vibration against her arm intensified. _Why? Why now?  
_

"Toph, are you...-?"

Concern? That sounded like concern. Dreaming? Was she still dreaming?

"Hey, Bud," he whispered, at her side. "You OK?"

His hand touched her shoulder - _that _hand. Now she remembered the dream. It was that hand that had carried her weight when she couldn't carry it herself, holding her high in the sky, holding her from death. That glorious, wonderful hand, it-...

Oh, no. What? Why was she feeling that way about his _stupid, _fat, meat-stack for a hand? Her cheeks were burning warm. The vapors of his night-hour breath caressed her nose. He was really close to her in that moment. Her heart was pounding in her chest. _Er, _from the dream! No, no, the _nightmare. _Right. That was why. Yea, that made sense, she was...shaken up. _Ugh._

Her stray hand propped her abdomen against the stone floor that was her bed. That hand could still feel those damned vibrations, those subtle tremors from that dumb slab of space rock, suddenly a reminder of weakness.

"Hell_-ohhh_, Toph?" Sokka's voice called her back, his firm, comforting grip gently nudging her abdomen forward and backward. Forward and backward. Whhh...-? "Hey, _yo, _wake up!"

The harsh clicking of skin against skin - Sokka snapping his fingers - rattled her ears.

"_Guh!_" she flinched out of her confusion at the sound. Her throat was still full of gunk, and her brisk intake of air elicited a couple more coughs. A couple led to a couple more, and Sokka pounded the side of his wrist against her back as she cleared her passageways.

"Still alive?" Sokka checked, evidently humored by this embarrassing moment for her.

"_Rrrmmph_," was about all Toph was able to manage, sluggish as she was in her sleepiness.

"'Kay, that's good," Sokka muttered, satisfied enough with her incoherent groans. "You have a nightmare, or what?"

"_Mmnnyeah_..."

"Heh, I thought _nothing_ scared you, O Metalbending Queen."

Toph smirked, her eyelids hung closed. Her head was sagging from drowsiness, but her heart was fluttering from his little bit of nicknaming - and one she didn't even have to prompt out of him, no less! Hm, _queen, _though? Nah, not so much her style.

_Fwumph. _Sokka's mass set itself down beside her. Her heartbeat began to quicken some more again. Ugh. _Why _did it have to do that?

"Hey, Toph..." Sokka shifted his body to her side, their hips pressed together as he laid an arm over her shoulder. Toph swallowed the lump in her throat and scratched at her chest. She worried that Sokka might be able to hear her heartbeat pounding at her ribs.

"_Argh_," Toph whimpered, rolling her head around her neck in exhaustion. "What?" she irritably croaked. She _liked _this physical contact. And she hated that she liked it. There was that retarded contradiction again. What was _with _that?

"Seriously, are you all right? I know tomorrow's gonna be hard when Kunyo comes, but, hey. We did our best."

"_Mmmph..._"

"What you said earlier, about your parents? I'm...sorry about that. It sounds like they, uh...never got back to you?"

Toph didn't speak, instead letting her head sag, her boar-q-pine of hair sliding against Sokka's arm.

"Come on," Sokka slapped her bare bicep and gave her a shake by her shoulder. _Rrghhh, _she was too tired and sleepy and grumpy and _graggh _to appreciate his gesture. "We'll figure something out. Maybe if we wake up early, we can squeeze it a little extra time to-"  
"No," Toph huffed. "_No, _Sokka, I don't...-" She yawned and clawed at an itch under her slightly hairy arm pit. "I tried. It's done. Let's...drop it. I wanna get some sleep."

"It's not like you to just...give _up_."

"Yea?" Toph testily grunted. "'S not like me to...be so _stupid, _either, n'..._rrghh..._"

Toph rubbed her fingers at her sandy eyes, brushing gunk out of them.

"Huh?" Sokka was puzzled. "What did you do that was stupid? I mean, you know..._this_ time."

"Funny," Toph flatly dismissed his attempt at humor. "Geez, Sokka! I'm bein' _serious _here, n' you go and-...Just-! _Nevermind_..."

Toph's face was warm, her breaths quickening, her heart thumping. She flicked out her wrist, morphing the stone floor beside her and sliding Sokka away, removing his grip from her. She couldn't deal with this right now. Already with these horrible thoughts of failure in her head, and then the nightmare, and now he was touching her, but picking on her, but...-! Why couldn't he...-? Did he _have _to be such a...-? _Arghhh._

Toph adjusted her sleeveless sleepwear and dropped herself back into the bare floor, face down. She fidgeted her loose blanket back on so it covered up her toes.

Toph's tired, aching brain was being circled with too many disappointing thoughts, too many fears of what was to come, too many..._feelings._

"Uh, sorry?" Sokka was clueless. "I mean, I know it's been a rough day and all that, but...-" Sokka trailed off.

Sokka being around was supposed to help her feel _better, _not worse. Right? That was how it worked. It was how it pretty much _always_ worked. Sokka made her feel better, made her feel comfortable, made her feel OK to be herself. Why, then, on this depressing day of facing her incompetence as a teacher was Sokka not only unable to help, but his presence was making it worse?

Toph's arm was trembling again. She snorted hot air in a huff and lifted herself up from her bed, bending the strange stone right off of her arm. She crushed it between her fingers, forming it into a mishapen lump, then shoved it in Sokka's face.

"Go put this...on my dresser or something," she grumbled, trying to make it less conspicuous than it felt.

"Er, sure," Sokka obliged. He took it and performed the task. Bah. He really _was _a clueless buffoon. He probably had no idea what that thing _meant _to her, did he? Maybe she'd been deluding herself this entire time, thinking the meteor rock had meant something to him when he'd handed it to her.

Toph dropped herself back down on the stone floor, her cushion of dirty hair like a bushy little pillow. She rested her palms down on the tiles below as her tired eyelids slid closed. She felt Sokka's movements, felt him setting the bracelet on the dresser at the edge of the room beside her.

"So, you're fine?" Sokka checked, stumbling around. Now that she was paying attention, Toph could tell that Sokka wasn't quite awake, either.

"_Mmm_," Toph lazily hummed some confirmation.

"I mean, like...on the _inside_," Sokka clarified. He yawned as he walked by. Toph was too tired to try bending the earth beneath him, so instead she flopped around her arms a bit to show him she he was about to step on her.

"_Ah_!" he yelped like a little girl, then grumbled something under his breath as he walked around her. His words ended with an audible "-didn't see ya there..."

"Actually, no," Toph admitted. Oh, crap. What? Huh? Where had that come from?

"No?" Sokka had paused.

"On the inside? I'm _not _fine," Toph mumbled quietly, still laying flat on her back on the cold surface below like a dead body in a morgue.

"Ermm...Oh, 'bout your parents?"

Toph sighed as Sokka carefully sat cross-legged beside her.

"Sort of," said Toph. "It's a buncha stuff, really."

"Ah."

A weird few seconds of quiet. Sokka sniffed dry mucus and scratched his nose.

"Well, uh...you need to, like, _talk _about it, or...-?"

Toph swallowed, which was hard to do with the big lump in her throat.

"I guess I'm just worried about the future, mostly."

"Oh. OK. Yea, I can hear that. I can relate."

"You can?"

"For sure. You know, when the war ended I figured I'd just end up back home in the South, but...I dunno, I guess I've had a bit of a, uh...a _calling. _You know? Like you and metalbending. I feel like I have more I can do."

"Hm."

"Aang's a good guy, and as it turns out, so is the Fire Lord - when he's not being, ya know, crazy? And I mean, the Water Tribe is obviously chill..." A pause. "_Get __it? _Because-"  
"Yea, yea..."  
"And it sounds like Aang and Katara are going to get through to the Earth King. Maybe this whole 'Harmony' thing can actually play out."

"I guess that would be kinda neat, or something."

"More like _revolutionary_."

"Heh." He needed fancy words for everything, didn't he?

"Anyway...-" Sokka got back up. He nudged Toph's side with his foot, and she grunted in playful, half-awake disdain. "If worse comes to worse and this 'school' thing isn't working, we can figure something out."

"Yea, all right," Toph mumbled as Sokka crawled back to the bed on the other side of the room. This was about as much gratitude as his words were going to get from her that night.

"Look at it like this," said Sokka_. _"No matter what happens tomorrow, one way or the other, you're looking at a new start: either your students make metalbending 'click,' or you ditch the school and...find some other calling."

"Was that..._optimism_?" mumbled Toph, befuddled and amused.

"Maybe just a little. But don't tell Katara I shared some with you. She thinks I'm a heartless jerk, and as her brother, I need to make sure it stays that way."

Toph smiled at Sokka's humor, and at this little moment of him actually seeing something good for her despite her failure.

"So, yea. Good night, Toph. Erm, again."

"You, too."

* * *

Cheers, shouts of awe, back-patting, apologizing...

The conflict between Fire Lord Zuko and Earth King Kuei had been resolved. From what Toph was hearing, it had been Twinkle-Toes and Sugar Queen that had set them at ease. Toph had been quite rattled by the whole day's mad events. Her students had picked up the pace and eked out a win against Kunyo's kids by managing to figure out how to bend metal coins to use as weapons. Then Toph and Sokka had been scooped up by Aang and Katara to help engage in a battle that could've been the start of another war between the two nations. Mere minutes earlier, however, to top it all off, the very earth beneath Toph's feet had been literally uprooted. She could feel that the entirety of Yu Dao had been physically separated from the land surrounding it. A gaping chasm now surrounded the city. Toph wasn't sure how practical this for right now, but it had certainly been a reminder of the Avatar's power.

When the ground had splintered, and her feet sensed the entire city of Yu Dao being separated from the mountains surrounding it, Toph had been flabbergasted. Such massive strength, such a display of skill and force...there was no else it could have been but Aang. _Avatar _Aang. That was a point Toph made the mistake of forgetting now and again. For such a softy, Aang was still the Avatar, and that stood for something. It meant that no matter how powerful, how refined, how strong Toph became...there would always be at least _one _person who would be better than her, as much as she didn't like to admit it. At least she could rest assured that the world's most powerful being was one of her best friends, right?

Toph's thoughts were being stirred by the conversations unfolding around her in light of the Fire Nation troops and Earth Kingdom soldiers making peace. People were expressing relief, protesting the premature end of the combat, apologizing to one another...The people closest to Toph - her students, some friends, some acquaintances - she was finding it hard to relate with and connect with these people in this seemingly emotional moment. It was a bizarre and startling reminder to Toph that for her, this was all just a fight, but for many of these people, it was life-changing. It was intimately tied to their pasts, their futures...They had family members they'd lost in the past, and looking toward the future they had...significant others to consider...

Speaking of which, Toph could hear Penga giggling like a schoolgirl - er, well, she _was _still technically a schoolgirl, but...Anyway, it was distracting. Toph's feet could feel the quickened heartbeats of Ho Tun and Penga, the shrimpy little girl gushing over her 'new boyfriend' as he humbly and bashfully mumbled away the credit she was doling on him. Spirits. Freaking crazy people.

"I hope you've learned a lesson today, Smellerbee."

"Yea, Sneers, yea...I learned that you're a _traitor_ to your own people."

"Don't you get it? Kori _is _our people! She has Earth Kingdom blood _and _Fire Nation blood within her."

"Whatever, Sneers..."

"You know," Sokka observed. "Smellerbee, you could really stand to lighten up a bit, man."

"I'm _not _a _man!_" roared the girl's gravelly voice.

"Whoa! Whoa! OK!" Sokka swiftly stepped down. "Right. Sorry. About that. Ahem."

Smellerbee railed at Sokka. "I can't believe you guys and even the Avatar would _defend _those Ash-Makers, after all of the _pain _they've brought us for so long!"

"Hey," Sokka defended against the gruff girl's sharp words. "Believe me, I'm no fan of the Fire Nation, either, but Zuko's _not _a bad guy. He wants the same thing you do: harmony."

"That's right," Suki added in her two pieces. "My warriors and I have been protecting the Fire Lord for months now, and he's actually-"  
"Wait, you _serve _him?" Smellerbee snapped with disbelief. "You were _just _fighting his soldiers a few minutes ago! I heard their army _attacked _Kyoshi Island!"

"Th-that was a long time ago, under _Ozai's _rule," Suki replied, startled by the angry girl. "Zuko's not the same, he's trying very hard to-"  
"Yea? Then why'd he just try to _kill _our _King? _And you'd _protect _him?"

As Smellerbee approached Suki and Sokka in a threatening demeanor, Toph's body tensed up on instinct. The angry girl was brandishing a dagger, and shoving her way toward Toph's friends. Toph didn't appreciate that, and with a focused thrust of her hand, she metalbent Smellerbee's dagger out of her hand and into the dirt, out of reach.

"_Hey!_" Smellerbee snarled, gaping around with surprise. "Who just-?!"  
"Smellerbee." The girl was froze in place.

Toph could detect that Smellerbee's little boyfriend - that guy who barely ever spoke - had grabbed her. He pulled her aside, away from the crowd.

"What?" Smellerbee growled under her breath, though she allowed him to drag her away. Toph concentrated on their conversation.

Longshot's calm, unassuming voice was advising Smellerbee from inches away. "I think they may be right. We lost Jet because he was unable to let go of his anger, and his obsession. He couldn't accept change. I hate to say it, but...maybe we're making the same mistake."

"Longshot..." Smellerbee was distraught and shocked, but Longshot continued.

"If Avatar Aang has faith in the new Fire Lord, we should, too. We should stand down."

"_Tch!_" Smellerbee seemed confused and dissatisfied by Longshot's advice. Toph could read that both their heart rates were elevated.

"Please," Longshot whispered. Toph suddenly felt awkward, able to eavesdrop on this more subdued, private tension with her acute senses, while the others nearby were all chattering in hushed tones.

"Y-you're right," Smellerbee mumbled to Longshot. "This...isn't 'Harmony Now,' after all, is it? It's more fighting. We're just doing what _Jet _did, and-...I didn't-...I didn't even think of it like that. Why didn't you _say _anything?"

"Actions speak louder than words," Longshot quietly explained. "I chose to trust you on this. But this isn't working. Now I'm asking you to trust _me. _Let's call a truce. Get our supporters to calm down."

"I just...want them _out _of our home already..." Smellerbee's breathing was forming into quiet, dry sobs.

"I know." Longshot drew her into an embrace, which she reciprocated. "But this is _their _home now, too. The Avatar was able to keep peace today, just as he ended the war: _without _taking lives. We should follow his example."

Huh. Keeping the peace, without taking a life. Toph was reminded of the fight she was just engaged in: using metalbending to restrain soldiers, but not kill them. It had been difficult, much more so than using earthbending to knock them aside without a second thought. It had taken a lot of focus and energy - Toph had needed her students' help, and even Suki had watched her back, defending them from fire with her metal fan shield. Toph's brain spent a few seconds whirling around the many possibilities and applications of metal, and how her newly discovered skill fell into all of that.

The squealing giggling of Penga brought Toph out of her internal state of being.

Toph shifted her weight around, trying to regain her bearings. Smellerbee and Longshot were off in the distance, hugging. Penga was trying to hold Ho Tun's hand, which he was bashfully letting her do out of shock and shyness. Penga was gushing over his strong arms and his bravery and his sensitive soul, and..._Bleh. _For Spirits' sake, even 'The Dark One' was prattling off some dung-pile of a poem about love blossoming on the battlefield between Fire Nation and Earth Kingdom. _Gag._ Toph was about ready to throw up from it all - Sokka would lighten her mood with his dumb remarks, she was sure. Toph gave her foot a light pound into the earth to pick up the vibrations around her. She deciphered Sokka's location with ease, having committed to memory the contours of his body shape, the particular pressure of his footsteps, and the distinctive pulse of his heartbeat.

That...wasn't weird, right?

_Ohhhh_, bleh. As soon as Toph figured out where Sokka was, she realized he was all over Suki. They were all...being _gross, _with their mouths, and their hands, and their heartbeats were syncing up, and _augh, _gross!

_Oogies all around._

Toph sighed, and with her head bobbed, she trudged away from all of this loving and kissing and nonsense. Toph went to the edge of the rift Aang had created around Yu Dao. She could feel that it went down a long ways. She sat her tired body down at its edge, letting one foot dangle over the crevice. She just wanted to be alone, instead of in the thick of everyone rubbing their gushy happiness all up in her face. Those guys had boyfriends and girlfriends, and they were being all sappy, and just like Aang and Katara, it was making them stupid in the head. Yea. It was dumb.

_Puh. _Toph didn't need that. Or want that. What use to her was that sorta thing? Someone supporting her, and loving her - for exactly who she was. Psh, she didn't need someone else to make her feel good about herself. Yea. She was just fine on her own. Someone else clinging to her arm with his muscular, slender hands, the scent of meat-breath over her neck, the-..._Eulgh! _What the heck? Why did her brain go there? Gross.

Anyway, she didn't need any of that junk, and soon enough it wouldn't matter. Sokka would just leave again, go back to...whatever it was he doing. Politics and stuff with Aang and Katara. Yea, right, like Toph had any place there. She'd had him for a few days after a year of absence. Apparently that was all the Meat-Head she was allowed now that the war was over and he didn't need her anymore.

That thought stung like a needle in her chest: Aang, Katara, and Sokka didn't need or want her around anymore. Her parents didn't seem to care what she did with herself, neither did they, huh? Well, whatever. Fine. More metalbending training. Yea, that was her purpose now.

Who needed a boyfriend? Or family? Toph Beifong had greater things to be concerned with. A higher calling.

She wouldn't miss him at all, not his stupid jokes or his sarcasm or his smart ideas or his encouragement or his...-

Toph's right arm was shivering.

Toph lifted her right arm and rolled up her sleeve, observing her bicep closely. Her meteor bracelet was shivering like mad, actually.

Oh, well, duh. Because the battle had ended. There was so much _emotion _going on, lots of earthbenders all around.

Still, all the same, Toph couldn't help but be reminded of the night prior, when thoughts of Sokka had been causing it to tremble. And she was, right now, brooding over so much stupid stuff. Parents, friends, students, life, _Sokka, _grah...It was all in tangles.

Toph could feel a headache coming on, and she rested her head against one palm. Her eyelids slid closed, her face was warm from bashful thoughts, and her body was tired from the battle. Longing and fear, exhaustion and hope, desire and regret, the prospect of her future so uncertain.

Toph just wanted to dull all the pain. Wasn't there stuff people, like, _drank _when they were feeling this way? Like wine, or something? Maybe she oughtta look into that some time.

Damnit, she just needed some space from all of this cheering and celebration.

"Hey, Toph!" Sokka's voice from behind. She flinched, feeling a fool about her no-doubt mopey appearance. "Whoa, what's up?" Sokka asked as Toph tried to come off as more casual. Suki was beside Sokka, her arm around his. Bleh. Toph could detect her three pupils coming up from behind.

"Ah, I'm good," Toph grunted as she stood back up. "A little tuckered out from all the commotion, that's all."

"All that metalbending must have you exhausted," Suki sympathized.

"Eh, I'm fine," Toph shrugged it off, wiping sweat from her forehead. Geez, she didn't look _that _bad, did she?

"Yea," Sokka dismissed. "She's tough, don't worry about her."

Once again, Sokka had said another stupid thing that made Toph's strangely inconsistent brain have dual reactions. It made her glad that he could recognize her independence. Yet it hurt a bit to feel like he didn't care about her well-being beneath the surface, like he had the night prior - when Suki wasn't around. _Hmph._

Toph's trio of students arrived.

"Sifu Toph! Wow!"  
"_Sifu! Sifu! _Your bending is _soooo good!_"  
"Mine eyes were bedazzled by your-"  
"Gonna stop ya right there," Toph interrupted 'The Dark One', shoving her palm upward toward where she knew his face was.

"We did it!" Penga cried.

"No doom for us today!" said Ho Tun.

"Behold, what our wondrous-"  
"No," Toph flatly declined Moo's attempt, simultaneously raising up a thin wall of rock in front of him.

There was a stiff pause between the two, until Moo bended the earth down, pushing it back into the ground.

"I _hate _my art getting interrupted," he grumbled.

"Heh, that's more like it," Toph jaunted, flashing a wide, devilish grin from beneath her mat of bangs. She pointed up a dramatic finger and shouted boldly. "**Hey! Lily Livers!**"

She delighted at the way they all stumbled back with alarm. Toph lowered her finger, pointing in their direction.

"I'm proud of you guys!" Toph told them. "You finally got the hang of basic metalbending, you helped save my school...you didn't give up on me when I _had. _And then you even disobeyed my orders, and came here to fight. That took guts, guys. But seriously. As soon as we get back, you're working on your forms and breathing techniques. Dinky little coins and spinny helmets aren't gonna cut it at _my _school."

"Sifu!" All three obediently bowed before her, just as she'd trained them to.

Toph pointed her finger toward the gate that they had just quarreled beside.

"Now get your butts in that city we just defended, and go find some dinner. You're gonna need full furnaces to take the heat tonight."

They repeated their affirmative gesture before scuttling off in high spirits. Toph's chest swelled with pride.

She was _not _a failure. She _was _still useful to her friends, to the Avatar.

Toph Beifong was still wanted, still needed, even now, a year after the war was over. She had a new purpose - to pass on this gift, this skill she had learned.

Her friends wanted to help change the world, help bring about harmony. That was well and good.

Toph wanted to bring honor to the Beifong name.

Toph wanted 'Beifong' to be synonymous not with wealth or riches or property, but with strength and honor and pride.

The Metalbending Academy had perhaps been a way for passing on pressure and pain she'd endured from her parents. But maybe, with some hard work and determination, it could become a way for her to receive her parents' support and attention once again.

With all of this radiating from within her being, Toph let herself smile, knuckles on her hips.

"Wow, hey." Sokka approached her, slapping his hand on her back. It found a place on her shoulder and he squeezed. He seemed to be looking off toward Yu Dao's gate, where the Lily Livers had scampered toward. "Those guys really look up to you, don't they?"

"Eh." Toph shrugged. She was too busy focusing on Sokka's physical contact - the heartbeat pulsing from his palm - to have really paid attention to what he'd just said.

"I guess I'm just glad you've managed to make a few friends out here on your own," said Sokka. "Honestly, I wasn't sure you'd manage so well without us."

"I can take care of myself, _by _myself," Toph primly responded, nudging Sokka's hand off of her.

"Sokka!" That would be Suki. Bleh. Her voice may as well have been a whistle to Sokka, who would dash toward it like a dumb dog.

"Ah, time to go," Sokka told her, giving her another pat. And here it was, that moment she'd dreaded. After a year apart, he was already disappearing from her again.

"_Uh, _w-wait, hey!" Toph spun around, extending her arm out to him.

"Yea?" Sokka slowed to a stop, and Toph charged at him. She dove into him, flowing her face into his chest.

"Whoa," he grunted, surprised. He reciprocated the hug.

Toph took in a deep sniff of his shirt and sighed out with some longing. She tilted her head sideways and listened to his heartbeat. _Gah, _so dumb. It was _so dumb _for her to care so much about such little details. But she just...did. And she didn't know why.

"I'll miss you, Meat-Head," she told him, squeezing him tight.

"Yea, you, too, Bud," Sokka replied. He pounded her back a couple times with his fist - too hard, actually, as some kind of joke. She laughed through her coughing and playfully shoved him off, her face warm and droplets forming at the corners of her eyes.

"Aw, that's so sweet," Suki cooed at their interaction. "It's like you two are brother and sister, almost."

Suki's words had meant to be authentically kind and caring - Toph could tell - but it still was a metaphorical punch to the gut.

"_Eh, _Toph here's a _lot _more mean than Katara is," Sokka chuckled, rustling Toph's hair and throwing her hairband off its center. "Maybe even more stubborn, too!"

They shared a laugh, though Toph's was more forced and fake than she'd like - an art she had perfected under her parents' roof. She bid them off to go wherever it was they were going. Somewhere without her.

This complex interaction now over, Toph noticed that familiar, discomforting feeling of her heart banging in her chest. She dried the edges of her eyes, wondering how long it would be until her friends would come back into her life. And sure enough, just as soon as Toph realized how she was feeling and thought to pay attention to it, she noticed it.

Toph's bracelet was shivering.


	4. Recovery

**A/N: This chapter (the fifth written for Esteemed) takes place the day after chapter 1, 'Afraid Not.' The narrative points this out, but I figured I'd mention it here, just in case.  
**

* * *

**Esteemed  
**_Recovery_

* * *

-128 ASC; Summer-  
-Toph's age: 40-  
-Lin's age: 8-

* * *

"-..._om? ...ke p...Mom...C'm...up!_"

"_Nngh...?_" Toph was slowly waking up to the sound of a familiar voice, her muscles sore and achy. There was a repeated pressure against her abdomen. Ouch. _Ouch. __Owwwww_, what-?

"It's _late, _Mom! You shouldn't sleep all day."

As Toph pulled herself up from her mattress, her head was thrown into a state of dizziness as it pounded with pain. Damnit, she was hung over, for sure.

"Lin...?" Toph mumbled, pushing messy hair strands from her lips with a '_Puh!_'

"Come on, get _up._"

Toph was still gaining her senses to the world around her. She nudged her sheet off, exposing her bare shins and arms to the air around her. Lin's slender little fingers wrapped themselves around Toph's wrist, and tugged, yanked, pulled.

Twisted.

Toph's entire arm was jolted with a split-second of intense pain. This act - her arm being contorted against her control - harkened back to the day before, when Yakone had forced her to unlock his shackles. She could practically hear the metal clattering to the floor, still echoing in her head as the last sound she'd heard before he'd cut off the flow of blood to her brain.

"M-Mom?" Lin gasped out, having instantly dropped her mother's hand.

Toph realized that she had flinched and jerked her arm away, teeth clenched.

"Did I hurt you?" Lin murmured, words shrouded with a bit of shame.

"Whuh...? _No,_" Toph eased with her croaky morning voice, putting on a shaky smile for her girl.

Toph shifted her body around and planted her feet inches off the mattress and onto the cold, stone floor. Ugh, her stomach was uneasy with nausea. Toph yawned, rubbing her bent knees to wake them up. They were all achy. And her stomach, and her head, and now her hand..._Blech._ Toph cautiously extended that hand with had just twitched in agony and found Lin's head. She planted her palm against Lin's hair. It was much smoother and wavier than her own. It felt a lot cleaner, too. Ech. The girl _had _just spent the night with 'Aunt Katara,' so no surprise there on the cleanliness. Toph preferred her daughter with a bit of grit and grime about her - she _was _a kid, after all. That was, like...how kids were _supposed _to be, right? It was proof they were out _doing _things, getting rowdy, having fun, learning important stuff like, erm...well...how to be _kids_.

"Are you sure?" Lin mumbled dis doubt, regarding whether she had caused her mother pain.

Toph ran her fingers through Lin's hair a couple times as she spoke to her child.

"What would make you think you could hurt your Mama, huh? I'm tough as a Badger-Mole, and twice as mean."

But Toph could feel through her feet that Lin's heartbeat was...flustered, somehow. Lin weaved her head out of her mother's grasp.

"Yea, I _know_," Lin grumbled. Toph caught this remark as a reference to the other day, during their training. Tough and mean - that was certainly Toph's approach to getting her daughter acquainted with earthbending. And the girl had clearly not forgotten it. "Anyway," Lin changed the topic from sass-talking to sympathy. "Sokka told me what happened yesterday - why I had to stay on the Island last night. It was because that bad guy hurt you."

"Oh..." Toph sighed through her nose, but her still-waking mind needing to draw in another yawn. Scratching her nails against her left bosom, Toph let her head cock over to the side. "Yea, we underestimated that man. But you shouldn't worry about that, it's all taken care of. I'm fine."

"Because Uncle Aang stopped him, right?"

_Grgh._ There was that tone again, that...admiration. That aspiring, loving tone Lin had been taking toward dear old Uncle Aang lately. What was _with _that? Why couldn't 'Mama' get that kind of tone, huh? Was that too much to ask, with all that she did? _Ulgh. _There went the stomach again, all queasy.

"Y-yea," Toph grumbled, getting up on her feet with some effort. "He helped," Toph stated in regards to Aang. She felt like she was going to throw up, some heartburn creeping up from her displeased stomach. It felt empty, too - Toph could barely recall hurling up in the backyard at some point during the night. She could barely remember Sokka coming home, she had been so out of it.

"He told me that he took away that bad guy's _bending_," Lin said in a hushed tone. "That's...kinda scary."

"Mm," Toph hummed, trudging past her daughter and rustling the girl's hair a bit. "He only does it to bad guys, Kiddo."

Lin tailed behind her mother, who was exiting the bedroom and making way for the kitchen. Lin noticed that Toph was gripping her stomach with one hand, her head with the other, and her steps weren't normal.

"What's wrong, Mom?" Lin asked. "Are you sick?"

"Maybe," Toph vaguely replied. She lingered in the kitchen area for a few moments, nauseated and feeling quite unwell. "Hey, do you know why Sokka didn't wake me up? And how come you're not at school?"

"He...didn't say, he just told me you were going to stay home from work today. And I don't have school today. But I'm still going to do my reading."

Toph sighed through her nose. Sokka had really been pushing Lin to read, read, read these days, now that she was getting proficient at it. Toph wasn't a big of that - after all, books didn't exactly do much for her. Sokka seemed invested in showing Lin how to be smart and responsible, like he was, but Toph would rather see her girl grow up to be strong and free.

"Ah," was all Toph bothered to reply with, leaning herself against the kitchen's stone island counter. Her stomach gurgled, tightening up with discomfort.

"You _look _sick," Lin noted plainly. "_Oh, _oh! Can I cook? I could cook you breakfast, Mom!" Lin clapped her hands together eagerly, the sound piercing Toph's head.

"_Urgh-! _Y-yea, OK," Toph grunted out, her face twitching with pain beneath sweaty bangs.

"_Yea!_" There was a thud, a strong vibration through the house from Lin's little body bouncing up with determination. "I'm going to make your _favorite_."

"Oh, that so?" Toph placated her daughter with a weak smile, rubbing gunk from her eyes. The eyes might not have been useful, but it was still annoying to get crap stuck in them.

The clattering of pots being shuffled around on the wall behind her made Toph's head pulse and ache. She needed to get some fresh air, and some water would also help. Maybe some coffee or tea or something would hit the spot better. Toph warily retrieved her large, stoneware water pot. She had enough energy within her to earthbend it to her waist and carried it by hand against her hip. Ugh. Too tired to earthbend, even? It was going to be one of _those_ days...

"I'm gonna go get some water, Kiddo," Toph informed, dragging herself to the back door. "Don't, uhh...burn yourself, or...-"

"OK!" Lin called back. More grating bangs of metal on metal echoed through the house, eliciting another flinch from Toph as she found her way outside.

The warm summer air was still humid, like yesterday, and Toph grunted in discomfort as she paced down the stone steps from the hand-crafted patio of smooth rock. As daytime heat immediately pressed down on her back, Toph groaned out a "_Bleh_," he tongue doggedly flopping out. It had to be close to midday by now, with how hot it was. The gentle tossing of waves soothed her as she approached the bay's water. Having a home at the edge of town had entailed living right next to Yue Bay, but Toph's high ranking position had made that an easy enough option. Lin and Sokka both seemed to love having the water close by, and Toph always had a bit of sand within walking distance should her toes get an inkling for the softer side of earth.

Stoneware in hand, Toph limped along in her hung over way. The sands that met her stung a bit at first, warmed by the sun, but she pressed onward, and within seconds was rewarded by the damp sand and the gentle licking of ocean waves across her toes. Sighing with relief, she hoisted up her stone pot, feet wedged into the earth at her feet. She tossed the pot out into the water, maintaining a bending grip on it with outstretched arms.

It landed with a loud '_ker-sploosh,_', and Toph tugged her arms back inward, drawing the pot right back up. It landed in the sand at her feet, sloshing out water against her shins.

Toph's attention, which was gradually heightening as she became more conscious, detected something odd. A loud splashing sound was...coming closer. Like something skidding rapidly across water? Confused, Toph stood out on the sand, still in nothing but her short-sleeved under tunic and underpants. She sniffed in the salty air and rubbed her nose, waiting for the curious sound to either stop or pass by. But it wasn't passing by. No, it was definitely approaching her. And as it did, Toph recognized what the sound was - a waterbender, traveling by way of ice surfing. No-doubt it was Katara, come to check up on her after the previous day's events. Ugh, like Toph needed everyone all snooping into her personal life right now.

"Hey, ya don't need to give me a house call!" Toph called out to the approaching waterbender. "I'm fine!"

"Ya sure _look _it!" called out the person, slowing to a stop about twenty feet away. "I was expectin' a few more bruises, ya know?"

Toph's spine tingled. That...was _not _Katara. It was a _guy. _Some guy she did _not _know. The voice egged her on.

"I'm surprised my boss didn't at _least _rough you up a little after all this time. Yakone must be gettin' old on us."

Twisting. Churning. Needles on strings, contorting her body from within. Toph's heart skipped at the memory from the day before, and of this reminder.

Just because Yakone was imprisoned did not mean that the Red Monsoon triad was magically gone.

"Or _maybe_," the man continued to taunt. "Maybe he's just savin' you all for _himself_. Eh?"

"Yakone's bending is _gone_," Toph managed to growl out through grit teeth. As she made this retort, she thrust up her hands, summoning a pillar of soggy sand out from beneath the water before her. It clumsily flopped upward, but the man before her waterbended himself with ease out of the way. Toph instinctively made a motion to whip out her metal cables, but...she'd just woken up, and hadn't put her belt on. In this moment of recognition, she was knocking on her behind by a sharp, stinging whip of water to the chest.

The wind knocked out of her, Toph was too stunned to stop this man from distancing himself. She couldn't tell where he was now, his sounds shrouded by the waves sloshing around him. Argh, _man, _and her abdomen was really stinging from that water whip. Bleeding son-of-a...-

"We locked that bastard up!" Toph cried out in regards to Yakone, lifting her back up from the sand. "He isn't going to be-"

"Yea, I _heard_," the man shouted. Ah, there he was - well, she could figure the general spot, anyway. "And you n' that pussy excuse for an Avatar are gonna pay for that, so-_Whoop!_"

Toph had cut him off by kicking up her feet, trying to summon up another, larger pillar. _Argh, _trying to bend sand through water was _not _working out so well. And she was far too out of it to muster up much mass insofar as bending was concerned, her head still pounding, now worsened by an increased heart rate.

Her second attempt having failed, the triad member simply cackled at her.

"Flamey-_oh-hoho! _You're as stubborn as I heard!"

"What do you _want_?" Toph shouted out. "You gonna fight me like a man or keep splashin' around like a turtle-duck?

"I've been waiting for you to finally drag your dumb ass outta bed to send you a message, _Chief!_"

Toph, her stomach burning with a dull pain from the blow she'd sustained, had gotten back up to her feet. She stomped her foot into the sand, ignoring the man's words, but he continued to relay what he'd been sent to say.

"The Red Monsoons are still _watching you, _Beifong! Your every bleedin' _move!_"

Toph made quick, tight motions with her open hands, summoning up a large chunk of sand and separating it into smaller chunks.

"Yakone ain't down for the count yet, and neither are we!"

Toph clenched her fists, squeezing the balls of sand into hardened makeshift rocks.

"We know where you live, and if you cross us, that kid o' yours _ain't _gonna fine when we're done with her!"

With a guttural grunt through grit teeth, Toph flung her hands forward, pushing the myriad of sand stones out toward the source of the voice.

She heard a yelp, and what she liked to think was the sound of earth pelting flesh. But the waterbender was quickly making his escape, unmoved from position above the waves.

Toph stood for a few moments as the sound vanished. Her body was tight, still squat in earthbending form, teeth grinding together, heart banging against her ribs. It took a few seconds of tension for her to accept that the triad member had escaped, and for her body to loosen up. Aching and sore all around, a moment of despair leaked from Toph's face in a frustrated whimper. So long had she been dealing with Yakone and his cronies, and even now, she was still not rid of their threat. If anything, Yakone's capture had made them quite ballsy to go delivering direct threats to her home.

Should she report it? _Ugh, _but that could just make it worse for her. She'd have to uproot her small, precious family that it had taken so long to build. No. Screw that. This was _her _home, and she wasn't about to let some two-bit lackey get her scared.

Yea. She wasn't scared of anything. Not at all. She'd never let them touch Lin. _Or _Sokka. And, psh, what? Had that guy tried to threaten the _Avatar? _Yea, she wished him good luck on _that _one. Because that had worked out just wonderfully for the biggest crime boss Republic City had ever known.

Toph wore off her shakiness and pushed her tired body to refill her spilled pot of water and bring it back inside. As she levitated it along toward the house with one hand, she made care to earthbend out any sand, grit, or sea salt crystals.

Upon entering the house, she was immediately welcomed by the savory scents chopped vegetables. Lin was preparing. Damn, for only being eight years old, Lin had already picked up some great cooking skills. If only Toph could get the kid off _cooking_ and _books _and focusing on junk that _mattered, _like making the very earth beneath her move at will...Lin was bound to become quite the bender, with the Beifong blood coursing through her veins.

"Oh, hey," Lin greeted between chopping food. "What took so long? You...-?" The chopping slowed to a pause as Toph trudged toward the fireplace, dumping the water in the cauldron they used for boiling. "Mom, are you OK?"

"Nothin'," Toph mumbled back. "Just had a bit of trouble filling this up, I'm not quite awake, heh. Hey, help your Mama get this fire started up, huh?"

"Sh-sure," Lin dropped what she was doing and skittered over to the fireplace as Toph went to sit down on the couch in their living room. She flicked her wrists about, bending off trace dirt and sand from her body. Sokka loved his stupid couch, and he'd throw a tizzy if she got it grimy.

Toph sucked in air between her teeth and she laid herself down, her entirety gnarled with pain and tension. She could hear Lin flicking flint stones together.

"Thanks, Kiddo," Toph sighed, sprawled across the couch. Her head was swimming with worry. If Yakone had truly been such an expert bloodbender, there was no way he wouldn't have taught at leas _some _of his cronies how to bloodbend. What if any of them somehow possessed his power? Or...or even just _normal _bloodbending, that was still bad enough, and _jeez, _her home was right next to the _water, _they could just-..._Bleh. _She needed to take her mind off of this. "Mama's not feelin' so great."

"So...you're _not _OK," Lin concluded with some contained and confused bitterness. The fireplace awakened with a whisping sound.

"No," Toph puffed impatiently. "Just _don't._..worry about it. All right?"

"Fine," Lin said with a rather intentional sigh.

Toph's face was covered in messy hair, her feet dangling over the couch's edge. She listened and rested as Lin went about preparing the meal. As the water began to boil, Toph got herself onto her bare feet and went about using the hot water to prepare herself a cup. She grabbed her favorite, trusty pewter mug and bended it into the hot water, scooping it up. She could smell Lin chopping up potatoes, a delight to her nostrils. Given the other smells present, it seemed that Lin was getting a batch of spicy potato curry whipped up. That and a cup of strong coffee ought to stir Toph awake and clear her head, for sure.

"I guess Sokka was right," Lin noted vaguely, tending to her cooking duty.

"Huh?" Toph dumped a small scoop of coffee grinds from the often-used container they stored their roasts in.

"He said you needed the day off," Lin explained. "Because you're not feeling well."

"Eh," Toph stubbornly conceded. She added no sugar to her drink, opting to let only the coffee grounds settle within. At this point, she didn't much care how good it turn out, she was desperate to get some caffeine into her system and straighten her hungover head.

"So, um...-" Lin began with some hesitation. "I bet you still think I should practice my bending today...huh?"

"Uh, _yea,_" Toph puffed out, letting the vapors of the steaming water and coffee trickle into her nose.

"But, well, you're not feeling good," Lin cited.

"So?"

"Uncle Aang offered to come visit and, um...give me a lesson today, since you...-"

"What?" Toph grumbled, befuddled. Aang had already done enough snooping into Toph's business over everything that had gone down the day before, and now he was trying to directly walk in and intrude on _her _training for _her _daughter? He had some nerve.

"I still need help, Mom, and I don't want to train with you if you're sick."

"I'm not _sick._"

"But you seem pretty sick to me."

"That's-...No, I just...-"

"Drank too much?"

Toph's nose wrinkled. She twirled around and leaned over her daughter's shoulder, directing what she perceived to be a fairly intimidating look down at the girl.

"You listen here, Lin. Don't you sass me like that. I'm your Mother."

Lin didn't reply.

_Tok. Tok. Tok._

Lin's knife hit the cutting board repeatedly. Toph breathed out with irritation. She could feel through her feet her daughter's elevated heart beat, so at least she'd made her point clear enough.

"Apologize," Toph commanded, stepping back to the counter where her coffee was brewing.

"I'm sorry, Mom," Lin curtly obeyed.

A stifling awkwardness lingered over the two of them for a couple more minutes, and Toph took a sample sip of her coffee, nearly burning her tongue. By now, Lin was boiling food in the cauldron, stirring it about.

In these moments of homey quiet, Toph couldn't help but recognize that she was being more terse with Lin than necessary.

She couldn't quite get it out of her head - that niggling worry. Fear? _Ha, _no. There was nothing to be _afraid _of. But, still, there was...some doubt. Toph couldn't keep an eye on Lin 24/7 - Spirits, Toph couldn't keep 'an eye' on Lin _at all. _She had to figure out what to do about this triad dung heap that had been spilled into her lap.

But that didn't mean she needed to take out her frustrations on her well-meaning girl.

"I'm sorry I got mad," Toph muttered out over the sound of boiling water.

Lin didn't respond, but Toph could sense the girl stirring the food.

"I'm just...feeling sick," Toph flipped around her phrasing for the sake of hoping to get her daughter's understanding. "I was hurt yesterday, and...Sokka was, too, and even though...we put that bad guy in jail, I'm, you know...maybe a little worried his bad guy _buddies _might try to cause trouble. I guess."

"Bloodbending."

Toph paused at the calm way Lin had said the word. Like she didn't really understand what she was saying - what it truly _meant._

"Does it...hurt?"

Toph took in a deep, solemn breath. Those terrifying moments kept replaying in her head, her own involuntary groans - Sokka's yelp of pain, the wave of undead-esque moaning - it bounced around in her skull, and she sought reprieve with another sip of her black coffee-like beverage. _Ech._

"Yea," Toph replied quietly. "It hurts like...nothing else I can think of."

"Oh...Sokka wouldn't explain it to me."

"That's because it's something you don't need to worry about."

Lin had abandoned her cooking pot, leaving it to boil, and walked over to her mother.

"But you're OK?" Lin asked once again. Jeez, Sugar-Queen's incessant worry-warting was really rubbing off, or something.

"Sokka's fine, Kiddo. _I'm _fine. Don't make a fuss."

Toph was startled as Lin's dainty body pressed itself against her. Lin pushed her head against Toph's waist, squeezing her mother's back. It was a tender touch, one that Toph could not recall having received from Lin in some time.

"OK," Lin whimpered out with a small sniffle. "When...when Aang told me...wh-what happened, and...how I needed to stay on the Island overnight, I...I was...a little scared."

"What? Hey. Hey, now..." Toph sipped her coffee and stroked her hand over Lin's head.

"I was sc-scared you got..._hurt_..."

"What did I tell you about that? No getting scared."

Lin sobbed, and Toph could feel a bit of snot getting rubbed into her tunic.

"And no _crying, _come...come on..." Toph sighed, her face flushing with embarrassment as her own eyes began to well up.

In all of the pain, the aching, the soreness...the headache, the fear, the queasiness...the past day had been quite a trip.

But this moment - this moment of innocent, physically expressed concern and love...that _meant _something. It meant something that Toph still, years after Lin's birth, was trying to figure out why she craved so much. Why so little of it could fuel so much of her being.

* * *

Toph's head was finally cleared up by the time Aang had arrived, and she had bothered to stick on proper clothes, too. After a stilted, awkward bit of small talk with Toph to make sure she was doing OK, Aang had been practically assaulted with enthusiasm from Lin, who was eager to get some earthbending practice in. The excitement in Lin's tone around 'Uncle' Aang stung Toph right in the chest, only reminding the mother of the grumbling and groaning she received from Lin in regards to the same act of training.

At this point, Toph could feel the air in front of her whirling a bit as Aang was kicking up a small twister, spinning himself in circles above the air. Lin had just handed him a blindfold and scurried off to hid beside a nearby tree in Toph's backyard. Toph was passively witnessing this so-called training session from the back porch through her ears and her feet.

Toph could feel Aang's body spinning against the dirt as he landed, facing the complete opposite direction that she knew Lin was hiding in. He shuffled his a feet around a bit, regaining his balance. Hunched over her porch steps, head bobbed, Toph paid attention as Aang steadied his stance in a rigid squat, balling his fists by his waist as he slid his feet against the dirt. It was just like she'd taught him, all those years ago. He lifted a foot and slammed it against the dirt. A moment of quiet tension passed, and Toph could detect her daughter's form almost blending with the base of the tree she was huddled against. Cheeky little one, Toph would give her that.

Aang's body rotated to face Lin, and he thrust out his arms, pounding his foot into the earth once again. Toph felt the ground beneath them wobble as his bending tremor traveled to Lin's exact position. A small pillar of dirt jumped up from the ground, knocking Lin off of the tree's base and onto her butt. Lin giggled, falling over on her back, and Aang in turn chuckled, removing his blindfold.

"Ah, see?" Aang called out, crossing the distance. "I told you!"

"I thought only Mom could do that," Lin said with a tint of amazement, lifting herself from the dirt.

Aang's form vanished from Toph's perception, only to reappear a couple of seconds later upon the upturned earth he'd just toppled Lin with. He seemed to hop up and land hard, bending the ground back into place.

"Well, she's the one who _taught _me, after all," Aang pointed out, extending an arm. Little Lin took it and was hoisted up. "Your Mom's pretty talented, you know."

"Yea," Lin muttered. Toph's keen hearing could pick up that tinge of bitterness, even across the distance. Another needle in her chest.

"What's wrong?" Aang asked.

"Mm," Lin hummed out vaguely.

"All right," Aang dropped the subject. "Here." He extended his hand, and Lin reached out to it, taking what Toph assumed was the blindfold. "Why don't you try?"

"Mom hasn't...really _taught _me how to do that yet," Lin pointed out.

"That's OK," Aang assured, giving her a pat on the shoulder as he led her to the spot where he had started off. "It won't hurt to give it a try. You never know."

"_Uhhh..._Sure," Lin gave in.

Oh, _pff. _Yea, all right. Toph had tried to get Lin to practice this technique earlier that week, and she'd refused. Suddenly, the girl was all too complacent when Aang babied her along.

Toph could feel Lin's body wriggling a bit, and she assumed Lin was tied her blindfold over her eyes.

"Ready?" Aang checked.

"Mm!" Lin's body was tight and tense with determination, and Toph sensed the girl's heartbeat rise a bit. Lin's bare feet slid across the dirt as she took her horse stance.

Then, Aang disappeared from Toph's radar, silently and without incident. Toph irritably puffed hot air at her floppy bangs, chin resting lazily in one palm as she waited for the old 'Fancy Dancer' to touch the ground. Toph could definitely feel Lin's presence, though - the girl was skidding her feet across the ground. After a few moments, Lin was smacking her right foot against the dirt every couple of seconds. Toph could already tell where Aang had touched down. Lin, however, didn't seem to have a clue. And how could she? Toph hadn't gotten her into that phase of training yet, since the girl was still learning the basics.

From a distance, Toph's interest was piqued when she felt a strange vibration emanating from Aang, like...some kind of shock wave? What? Aang seemed to be gesturing his hands in quick and quiet downward thrust. He'd take a step with each movement. Was he creating small tremors with his footsteps? After he'd performed this act a few times, Lin seemed to catch on, and was slowly but surely starting to find her way toward Aang's movements.

Toph's insides bubbled with irritation. What good was it to trick your student into thinking they were succeeding? That was useless! _Urgh. _Maybe Aang and Katara wanted to teach like that, but Toph wanted her daughter to be strong, iron-willed, not coddled.

By the time Lin had made her way about ten feet from Aang, he'd stopped his slight of hand bending, and she'd gotten a bit lost as a result. Just as she started meandering off away from where he stood, Aang called out to her.

"Hey, not bad!"

Lin paused, spinning around as she pulled off her blindfold. Upon realizing how close she'd made it, she gasped with some delighted pride and hopped in mild celebration.

With a sigh, Toph pushed herself up from the steps of her back porch and stalked toward the two of them. Aang was giving her a pat on the back as she excitedly rambled about how she had barely been able to feel his steps.

"-but then I...I guess I messed up, and started...going the wrong way, but...-"  
"But you still got pretty close for your first try," Aang encouraged. "Put in some practice, and some day you might be able to do it like your Mom does."

"You really think so?"

"You've got natural talent, Lin," said Aang, kneeling to her eye level and giving her shoulder a squeeze. "I'm sure you could become a great bender if you focus on your training."

Lin seemed a bit speechless at his compliment, while Toph's insides were wriggling with a mixture of frustrated and conflicting thoughts.

As Toph got close, Lin noticed and scampered her way.

"Mom! I just tried-"  
"Yea, I know," Toph mumbled, her disinterest more apparent than she'd intended. Lin stalled to a stop right before her, and Toph sighed through her nose, head pointed right over her daughter. "Uh, good effort, Kiddo," Toph tried to save face. She planted her palm on Lin's head, which was at least more sweaty and gritty now that she'd been doing some bending practice. "Now c'mon, it's time to cook some lunch."

"Ooh, can Uncle Aang join us?"

Aang let out a sheepish laugh, but the corners of Toph's mouth arced down ever so slightly, her nostrils wrinkling as she removed her hand from Lin.

"Well," she said pointedly, "If Uncle Aang wants to eat _meat - _which is what we're having - then...sure."

"Oh..." Lin's excitement wilted a bit. "I wanted to...practice a bit more, and...-"

"Hey," said Aang, walking right up to the both of them. "Don't worry about me. I'll go run some errands while you take a break with your Mom, OK?"

"Mm..." Lin nodded toward him, evidently uncertain about him leaving.

Aang assured her, "I'll be back in a little while, I promise."

"OK," Lin accepted his word. "And can we do more practice?"

"Er, well...-" Aang's body seemed to direct itself to Toph, who was struggling to suppress the unexplained pit her stomach. Aang spoke. "If you Mother's fine with it, then...-"

"Please, Mom?" Lin begged quietly and politely. Geez, where was she getting this courteous attitude, from? Maybe all of that house sitting at Air Temple Island while Toph and Sokka were at work was making Lin too soft for her own good. "_Please?_"

"Yea, yea," Toph murmured out with hesitation, nudging Lin back toward the house. "But first, we gotta get some meat on those bones of yours. Go start up the fire, I'll be there in a minute."

"OK!" Lin obediently scurried by, and Toph could sense the girl's body twist back toward them, her arm stretched up. "See you later, Uncle?"

"Yep! I'll be back," Aang insisted as he waved over.

Toph waited until Lin's presence had disappeared into their home, her head craned over her shoulder.

"Toph?" Aang mumbled to her, confused. "Is everything all right?"

Toph snapped her head toward him, stepped right up to him and jabbing her index finger into the dusty fabric over his pectoral.

"What're you doing?" she grunted in quiet accusation.

Aang pushed her hand away from his chest and crossed his arms.

"I'm visiting," he stated. "Why, did Lin not check with you first?"

"No, she didn't," Toph said. She paused, recalling that Lin _had _brought it up, and Toph _had _indirectly OK-ed it. "I mean, not...before she'd asked you, anyway. I wasn't expecting company today."

"Why didn't you say something when I arrived?" Aang asked, his tone softening."Do you need more time alone, or...-?"

"N-no, I don't...-"

"I could go get Sokka if you want, tell him you're not feeling well-"  
"I'm _fine, _Twinkle-Toes."

"I _told _you to stop calling me that..."

"This isn't _about _us, it's about _her._"

"What, do you want Katara to look after her again tonight? I'm sure she wouldn't-"  
"_No, _I didn't mean...-!"

"Are you _sure _you're OK? You seem out of sorts."

"_Rrgh_..." Toph scraped her fingernails against her hair line, taking a step away from this hushed back and forth she was trying to engage in.

"Did something else happen?" Aang asked. Damnit, why did he have to be so...perceptive like that?

"I must...just still be feeling off," Toph huffed out. It was easier to let herself look vulnerable and stressed than to admit she was afraid and jealous. "I dunno, maybe my...cycle's starting back up, or...-" Yea, that was a feasible explanation, right? He wouldn't go asking about something like that.

"Ah. It..._has _been a crazy week, hasn't it?" Aang sympathized. "But listen. Toph." Against her shoulder, Toph could feel Aang's hand - once squishy and delicate, now sturdy and firm in his older age. "We _got _him. Yakone is behind bars. He's not going to be hurting any one any more."

"Y-yea, ya don't gotta tell _me_," Toph grumbled with indignity. "In case ya forgot, _I'm _the one who locked him up myself. Bastard'll rot there for the rest of his days, as far as I'm concerned."

"Exactly."

"But, I mean, the Red Monsoons...-" She trailed off. She couldn't bring herself to tell him of her encounter that morning. She didn't need the Avatar getting involved any more than he already had. Yakone had tried to assassinate Aang, only to have his bending removed. The Monsoons were just as likely to try coming after the Avatar and his family if Toph made any kind of move against them right now. Toph had one kid to protect, but Aang and Katara had _three_ now, and then who knew how many others on that island.

"I know, they're still out there," Aang conveyed his understanding. "But without their leader, they're probably disorganized. Your officers - and you, once you're back on your feet - will take care of it," Aang put her at ease. "And if you need my help, you know that you don't even have to ask."

_No, I _don't _even __have to ask, because I don't _need _your help._

"I know it's got to be difficult," Aang related with her, "trying to not think about all of this, but you _really _need to set some time aside right now for your family - for _yourself. _How long has it been since you've taken a break for more than a day?"

"I...I don't...-" Toph couldn't quite remember. The past few months had been exhausting with all of the gang activity going on.

"Even _you _need to rest once in a while," Aang pointed out, patting her arm as he broke their contact. "Sokka told me you didn't sleep well last night, and given what happened, I don't blame you. To be honest, I didn't get good rest, either."

_Urgh! What're you _doing, _you Meat-Head? Blabbing about our personal lives..._

"OK, all right, I _get _it," Toph huffily dismissed Aang's attempt at getting her to expose herself. "I'll...look into taking a few more days off, but if some kind of emergency comes up, I'm not just gonna sit on my ass."

"All right." Aang seemed satisfied. "Maybe it'll be a good chance to bond with your daughter, have some fun for a change? Instead of just being all focused on her training."

"Yea, and _another _thing," Toph puffed, circling back to the original topic of discussion. She latched her hands on her hips and attempted to give Aang a scowl. "What _was _that out here?" she demanded. "I'm not ignorant, ya know. I could sense your trickety-trick, playing head-games with my kid."

"Head-games?"

"You _lied _to her, Aang," Toph accused with disappointment. "Made her think she's better than she _is._"

"Oh, that? No, I was...just trying to give her some confidence."

"She doesn't _need _confidence."

"That's a little hypocritical, coming from you."

"I think I've earned my place, here. Lin doesn't need her ego stroked, she needs to stop being so lazy and practice the new _forms _I keep trying to get her on."

"Toph, Lin's...just a child, I don't think it's such a-"  
"_Wh-?! _Just a _child? _Um, hello? By the time we were _thirteen, _we'd ended a century long _war, _for Spirits' sake. I was one of best benders on the _planet_ before my cherry had even popped."

"Toph," Aang sighed - he sounded just the slightest bit uncomfortable by her 'cherry' remark. Typical. "That was during a _war_. But now, we're living in a new kind of world. We're living in a time of peace. One that doesn't need bending to be used for _violence _on a day-to-day basis."

"_Heh! _Right. That's why yesterday played out the way it did, right? No. There's still psychos out there, and my daughter's going to learn to protect herself."

"I..._completely _understand, and I'm not saying she shouldn't."

"And I _am _saying that she shouldn't be _coddled_."

"OK." Aang seemed to be backing off a bit. It never seemed to take much to get him to lily-liver out of an argument, but Toph was at least a bit impressed he had been sticking with it this long.

Toph posed to him, "Did I coddle _you, _when I trained _your _sorry ass into shape?"

"No," Aang replied with a touch of defiance.

"Then I'm _definitely _not gonna pamper my own flesh and blood."

"The way you approached my training worked because...it _had _to," Aang walked around her point. "We had to protect the Earth Kingdom. We had no other choice - I _needed _to learn, so I...dealt with it."

"That's my _point. _You sucked it up. If even _you _could do it when you were little, my daughter should be able to handle it, no sweat. I don't need her going all soft."

"She's not 'soft,' she's eight years old."

"I was training with wild badger-moles in caves when I was eight - _and _blind. Lin can barely move pebbles around."

"That's...great, Toph," Aang muttered. He was starting to get impatient. Good. Maybe he'd let it drop and accept that she was right. "I just don't think it's a good idea to put all of that pressure on Lin when she's still so young."

"I don't think it's a good idea to tell me how to raise _my _kid."

Aang sighed through his nose. His heart was starting to race a bit from the tension in their discussion.

"Fair enough," Aang let the matter drop. "It's just that...it _seems _like maybe - at least at this early stage - Lin might need to build her way up a bit."

"That's for me to decide."

"All right. OK. So...do you _not _want me to train with her?"

"_Mmph._" Toph grunted through slightly flared nostrils, folding her arms across her chest. She wanted to say '_No.' _But she knew, right then and there, that if she did, it would just make Lin look at her as 'the bad guy.' So she'd have both Aang _and _her kid angry with her. Damnit. She just couldn't learn to shut her mouth and let dung roll off her back.

Aang was waiting for her answer, so she gave him one.

"Fine, you can train her once in a while - I already can tell she's going to ask you without my say-so as it is...But no more of this crap where you give her fake expectations of herself. We clear?"

"We are."

"Well...All _right_, then. So...-" She flicked her wrist off at him and turned back to head inside. "Until later."

"Enjoy your lunch," Aang said to her back. "And I'm serious, Toph - try to just relax a bit with Lin."

"Gettin' right on that, thanks."

Toph wriggled her hand up over her shoulder at him. She wanted him to leave already. Trying to talk about all of this drama and such was only stressing her out even more. If he was so perceptive, couldn't he at least figure that much out?

As Toph trudged her way back to the back door of her home, she felt Aang's twinkly little footsteps fade off into the found herself conflicted by her own attitude. Aang was an old and dear friend - the first real friend she had ever made. He genuinely cared, not just about her but about Lin, too. Toph _knew _that, deep down, and yet still her bristles and spines would stab out at the first sign of her ego coming under fire. _Rrgh, _why did that still happen? She was forty freaking years old, she shouldn't still be...-

"Hey, Mom." Lin's voice ripped Toph from her inner workings.

"Hey, Kiddo," Toph breathed out tiredly, willing the door closed behind her. She could hear the crackling of the fire across the way.

"I was wondering what was taking so long..."

"Ah, it's nothin'," Toph assuaged the girl's curiosity. "Just catching up with Aang."

"About the bad stuff from yesterday?"

"Pretty much."

Lin prodded at the coals of the fire she'd started. "You guys...seem mad at each other lately."

At Lin's astute observation, Toph's nose let slip a forced sigh.

"Don't worry about it," Toph pushed the matter aside. She pulled out their half-consumed loaf of bread from that morning and metalbending their bread knife to the cutting board.

"OK." Lin could tell this was just another thing Mom wasn't going to open up about, and she might as well drop the subject. "But, um...-"

"Yea?" Toph checked, hand slicing the bread with careful motions.

"Aang's still coming back later, right?"

"Yea, he is. I told you, don't worry. It's fine." Toph set the bread back into its box as she retrieved some cured meat from its container. Sokka had taken Lin aside a couple of days prior and walked her through the steps of salt-curing it, and now was as good a time as any to make use of the stuff.

"Thanks, Mom. I...really like training with him."

"I could tell," Toph mumbled, sawing her knife at the bread in her hands.

A few moments of homebody quiet passed, with Toph cutting up fresh vegetables while Lin took the cured meat and prepared it to be cooked. The two of them prepped food side by and side in those precious seconds, and Toph had to admit that she savored these moments alone with Lin. Not that she minded Sokka's presence, it's just that the man had a habit of bringing noise and sound to the mix, when now and again some quiet understanding could go a long way.

As she cooked the meat across the way, Lin's voice traveled to Toph.

"We're pretty lucky, huh?"

"How's that?" Toph wondered.

"We get to be friends with the _Avatar_. That's...really neat. The most powerful person in the world? _And _the smartest, too."

"I dunno about all _that_..."

"Because, well...Isn't the Avatar connected to all of the previous Avatars before them?"

"I...guess, I don't...-" Toph sniffed, her eyes dampening from the onion she was chopping up. "Your Mama's not so big on that Spirit stuff. You know that."

"I know. I'm not, either. That's just neat to think about that stuff."

"Sure."

The two finished their task of putting together beef-ham sandwiches, completing a third for Sokka when he returned for his midday meal break, which would be fairly soon, Toph surmised.

The two sat together out on the back patio of their home, the distant sound of boats traversing the bay's waves keeping them company.

"How is it?" Lin wondered, curious as to her meat-cooking skills. Toph could hear the girl's jaws digging into her meal eagerly - she was no-doubt hungry from being a busy-body that day. Cleaning, training, cooking...Lin was being more obedient than usual, and Toph wasn't going to complain.

"_Mm_," Toph hummed her approval, mouth full of food. As she chewed, she reached out to hand to her daughter's head. She scratched her nails across Lin's wavy, sweaty hair. The man whom Lin had inherited that hair from had been quite the mistake, but at least even he had brought some kind of blessing to Toph's life. Toph was still working on trying to appreciate that, but Aang had been right: some quiet time relaxing with the girl was more enjoyable than she'd normally expect. "Tastes fine, Lin," Toph replied after she'd swallowed.

"I hope Sokka teaches me more about cooking."

"_Ha! _Yea, you and me, both."

"Then I can make even _better _food for you."

"I'm sure I wouldn't that."

"And_ also, _I hope Uncle Aang teaches me more about bending."

"Mm..."

"I'm really glad that Uncle Aang and Auntie Katara live so close to us."

Toph took a moment to contemplate this notion.

"...Yea. Me, too, Kiddo. Me, too."

The two ate their sandwiches in peace. Well, Lin did, at least. Toph ate hers with in a silent state of anxiety as her brain spun a web of worries.

_If things with the Red Monsoons take a turn for the worst, at least I know they'll have my back. Maybe I'm being too hard on them. They're trying to help us out here. Still, Lin is _my _daughter, and I need her to be strong. To know how to protect herself, how to protect Sokka - poor idiot thinks his boomerang can save him from some of the kinds of creeps lurking our streets...Being the Police Chief's kid makes Lin a prime target for the Monsoons if they've got a revenge wish. I can't ignore that. But I also can't go dragging everyone else into my problems. Damnit, what am I going to do about this mess? Yakone kicked my ass while barely flinching a muscle. What if he was able to teach his lackeys how to bloodbend? What do I do if-  
_

A small burp from Toph's left caused her to drop that train of thought. Another burp from Lin, just as small and dainty, elicited Toph to smirk. Toph swallowed her last bite of sandwich and let her own belch pop out, bringing out a giggle from Lin.

"You burp like a boy, Mom," said Lin, dusting crumbs off of her pants.

"Oh, really?" Toph played with a mischievous tone. "I thought that was a 'dignified lady' kind of burp."

"_No_," Lin chuckled.

"You sure? Here, lemme...-" Toph willed up another burp, but wasn't able to get it as loud as the last one. She rolled with it. "That any better?"

"A little, I guess," said Lin, evidently amused by her mother's childish behavior.

"C'mon, then," Toph goaded, nudging Lin with her elbow. "Let's hear it."

"Mm?"

"You give me another _girly _burp," Toph requested, slapping Lin on the back. "Show me how it's done."

"I can't!" Lin bashfully shrugged off her mother's arm.

"Ah, c'mere..." Toph tapped at Lin's shoulder, gesturing the girl to slide over toward her.

"What?" Lin mumbled with some impatience.

"Sit with your Mama for a minute," Toph offered.

Lin paused, evidently dumbfounded. Her mother wasn't prone to random acts of sensitivity and tenderness. Something seemed off, but Lin figured it best to just appreciate her mother's currently kind attitude.

Lin was startled as the stone beneath her rippled, a small wave of earth moving her leftward and into her mother's side. She laughed through her nose, amused by her mom's nonchalant bending. Toph's slender but sturdy arm latched itself across Lin's back and shoulder, and Lin leaned into her mom's side, taking a deep breath.

Toph extended her legs down the patio's steps, letting the warmth of the sun massage her feet. She twisted her neck to the left, letting her chin fall on Lin's head. In the quiet, Toph was able to grasp just how achy she was - her joints, her head, her arms...The soothing heat of the sun on her toes was relaxing, and the steady, subtle vibrations of Lin's heartbeat through Toph's palm was the melody to a lullaby. This rare moment of her child's warmth against her breast brought Toph back to an earlier time, when she had been less appreciative of holding her own daughter. Toph maybe still didn't really understand why her heart could be rendered so stung one minute and so full the next, all on account of this girl - but she would be damned if she'd let anyone hurt the kid.

"Sooo...-" Lin's heels tapped against the steps. "What do we do now, Mom?"

Toph answered by humming out an '_I dunno.'_

"Umm...Should I...-?" Lin made a gesture to get up, but realized her mother's grip was pretty solid on her.

"Take a break, Kiddo," Toph eased, rubbing the girl's back and letting her re-settled down.

"You're...acting weird, Mom," Lin mumbled out. "Is everything OK? Do you have a fever? Does your arm still hurt?"

"Mama's just a little tired today," Toph explained casually, embracing the girl in her arm. "Even _I _need to recover here and there."

"Oh. But...how is sitting here helping you feel better? Shouldn't you lay down in bed, or...-?"

Toph grinned, rustled Lin's hair a bit, and planted her chin back down the girl's dusty nest of a head.

"You know what, Kiddo? You help me feel a lot better just by being here. I guess you must be pretty special like that, huh?"

Lin smiled a little bit at her mother's vague explanation. Mom was having a bad time lately - she knew that. If sitting here for a while in peace and quiet was what Mom wanted, Lin was OK with that. She adjusted herself into a more comfortable position.

Lazy lounging on a summer afternoon, hum of Republic City behind them, the gentle whispers of the ocean's bay in front of them, and her daughter's heartbeat singing a song over it all. This proved to be the most effective medicine for Toph's ailments.


End file.
